by Richard Serra

Created on: February 25, 2007   Last Updated: February 15, 2010

For a number of years, I've always looked at those with a poor appearance as lower in class, because that is what seems to be the norm in thinking that way. It wasn't until I had some huge surprises as to who some of these people really were. Some were rich, some were in some high positions at their jobs, and others were well off enough that they could have a much better appearence if they chose to.

Sad as it may be, for the most part, we are in fact judged by our appearance. But how important is it? I mean think of "who" it is that is doing the judging. Some might think that these are shallow insecure types, who like to think they are above someone who chooses to dress using non designer clothes, or don't style their hair, of anything else that puts them in a position to feel superior.

They lack the kind of intelligence that those who are of a higher intellect are not bothered by personal appearance, but rather what that person has in his or her mind. The point I'm trying to make, is that if you try to fit in to please those that won't accept you, unless you have a certain outward appeal in the way you dress or groom, then you can consider yourself just as shallow and insecure.

The glitz and glitter is for losers who go through life trying to impress others who in turn try to impress them, and nobody really wins.
Don't worry. If you lose those shallow types of friends, the other side of the coin is that you inherit a whole bunch of new ones that are secure about themselves and who are honest about themselves and to you.

At one point in my life, I decided to try sales, and one was selling new cars for a local dealer. This is where I had a rude awakening as to how important it was not to be judgmental about another's appearance, especially the customer. Time and time again salesmen wouldn't even bother with someone who came on the lot to look around if they looked like they needed a job.

They would even tell me not to bother, that I would be just wasting my time, and blow my turn at making a sale. Fortunately I didn't pay too much attention, and decided to handle those who came in, just to get a feel of who or what I was dealing with. As the other salesmen snickered, I landed a nice sale with one of the homeliest looking gents that you'd ever want to see.

That was all it took for me to change my way of thinking. One by one, I would make a deal with these less than desireable looking customers, and the snickering stopped as they saw how many  sales I was generating from these poorly dressed customers. Even those without any thought to grooming, came through with sale for me.

It was then I realized, that you cannot judge anyone for what they appear to be. There are people who don't care about fashion, grooming, or impressing others. They have money, and spend it on other things that give them pleasure. Then there are others who fit what they look like, and that is someone who has no money, no job, no home, and no desire to do anything about it.

It comes down to separating between the types, and the only way you can do that is to not prematurely judge someone, and just do what you need to in order to satisfy yourself that you are, or aren't dealing with the right person. We constantly worry about image rather than who we really are. Time to relax!

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