by Troy Norris

Created on: April 16, 2010

The power of networking and its benefits for the endeavoring small business owner have transformed over the last several decades from a not so well kept secret, to an accepted rule of thumb, and into a full blown cliche, leaving many business owners to collect business cards and dutifully attend local and national small business networking meetings without first considering a very important question.

"Why in the hell exactly am I doing this?"

Networking is about relationships, and like any relationship that is truly successful, all parties should benefit positively in some way. This isn't as shallow as it seems, while all relationship have unnecessary aspects that add to the joy we receive from them, powerful relationships at their very core are based on the meeting of a profound need. When that need is met or is no longer being fulfilled, no matter how much we may like that person, the relationship tends to degrade. There's no longer a driving impulse to maintain the connection and grow together with that person.

This is all something we understand at some level, the unfortunate part is that rather than seeking relationships that can provide real long term benefit for both parties, the modern, networking small business person sees networking events as a means of alleviating the one all encompassing need that keeps them up at night and greets them as soon as they wake up the next morning. Sales. This sad fact has turned a powerful opportunity for mutual growth and companionship into an unholy network marketing free for all, where the unprepared can find themselves quickly drowning in a sea of entrepreneurs in full selling attack mode. Now this isn't completely without merit; I have managed to find a hand made cigar maker I never would have otherwise, and had business cards ready when I need an exterminator and a foundation specialist on short notice. But the problem is that this is where leveraging a network ends from most small business owners. Just another meeting and sales pitch to another customer.

As a backlash against these hollow and impersonal standards, I decided to get back to the roots of networking. The way it used to be done. I called 4 people I was friends with or related to who were also business owners in their own right, and asked them if they wanted to form an alliance. After the awkward silences and confused stares had passed, I explained that there was lunch involved and they were in.

It was the start of something magical. Even though none of our businesses were even related, we didn't start out with much interest in or understanding what the others were doing, and were from different backgrounds and demographics, the fact that everyone had agreed to provide support, advice, and a receptive atmosphere led to the formation of a very tight group. Just by committing to sit down together face to face twice a month and listening we all got a grasp on the others business, the collective experience of the group increased exponentially, and our one man versus the world existence was replaced by a family of entrepreneurs who nurtured each other.

At this point, I couldn't imagine life without them and implore every entrepreneur out there to take that step of asking other entrepreneurs into their circle. It's easy to get discouraged or overwhelmed if you don't have someone there who understands what you're going through, and who can be both a mentor or a friend when you need one. There's really nothing to lose and everything to gain.

Learn more about this author, Troy Norris.
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