by Elizabeth M Young

Created on: April 12, 2010   Last Updated: April 29, 2012

Sometimes cell phones and public rudeness are in the mind of the beholder. Some people get agitated whenever they see anyone using a cell phone in public at any time, whether they have anything to do with the cell phone user or not. That is not reasonable and any overt displays of displeasure that are directed to cell phone strangers are unnecessary and rude.

Sometimes cell phones are a necessity and are not the business of others who have no interest in interacting with or talking with a person. When a person strolls through the supermarket, discussing the shopping choices with another member of the household or with someone who is working with them on an event, it is highly appropriate to discuss the various prices and food items on the cell phone. There might be out of stock items or surprise sales where a joint and on the spot decision is needed.

Sometimes an acquaintance is put off when wishing to say hello to a person who is using the cell phone as a barrier to a brief "hello" or short conversation. It is quite fine to ask the other party to hold for a few seconds and to briefly greet the acquaintance. But maybe it is rude for the acquaintance to use an unplanned public meeting for an opportunity to engage in an extended discussion in the first place!

A person who is at dinner with others and who has frequent cell phone activity needs to excuse themselves or put the phone on hold until dinner is over. Expecting other dinner guests to wait through repeated cell phone conversations is not only rude, but is inconsiderate, and the behavior might even be an overt expression of hostility toward the others.

Loud cell phone conversations in public places are as rude as any other loud conversation that disrupts the peace of other people.

Taking inappropriate, unpermitted or illegal cell phone photos or videos is rude, pure and simple. If a person broke out a digital camera and started snapping photos in the department store dressing rooms, no one would tolerate it.

Driving while talking on the cell phone, without a blue tooth or hands free apparatus is not only the ultimate rudeness, it is as mindlessly life threatening as driving while intoxicated. Cheers to the states that issue severe punishment for talking without hands free while driving. Texting while driving should have the same legal consequences as drunk driving.

Finally, one never knows whether a person is getting terrible or important or fantastic news that will change their lives forever. One never knows whether a family member is severely ill and in the hospital, or if a nervous new parent is having a first outing without the baby. One never knows if a friend or loved one who lives far away or who rarely calls is being given special accommodations. Understanding that these may be the reasons for a cell phone use will allow for the idea of showing compassion rather than displeasure.

In summary, public rudeness and cell phone use goes both ways. When a person is having a discreet conversation in areas where strangers have no expectation of attention from the person, then it is rude to take an obvious attitude about it. When a person is using the cell phone to put up barriers or to test the patience of friends and others who have an expectation of interaction, then it is rude to continue the conversation or conversations, and the phone needs to be put away.

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