by L.S. Watts

Created on: April 06, 2010

According to the US News and World Report, ninety percent of Americans feel as though good manners have diminished greatly in the world. Many think this has to do with our busy world and parents failing to teach the next generation how to be courteous and kind.

Studies show that kids with good manners are more likely to succeed in all areas of their life compared to those that are rude and disrespectful. So how do you teach your child to be well mannered? Practice by daily application is a good place to start. This means you must lead by example. You also must be committed to this change through the long haul.

If you have children who are rude little buggers all the time, you could gradually work on teaching them good manners. Change doesn’t always happen over night. First, make a list of areas that could use some change. Perhaps it is just simply the lack of please and thank you; or it could be repulsive table manners. Regardless, pick one manner from your list to practice for a week. The next week continue with the first manner but pick up another manner from your list. This makes the transition easier. It also has a better chance of sticking around.

When your child has displayed good manners, be sure to let him or her know how proud you are. Praise makes most everyone feel good and it just re-enforces these good manners. It isn’t always necessary to praise them on the spot because for some children it may be embarrassing. Perhaps later, in private, you can say something like, “I am proud of you for offering your seat to Grandma today. That was a very polite thing to do."

What do you do if your child continues with the disrespectful attitude? Give them a consequence. Perhaps have them send a hand written apology card to who ever they offended. Ground them from hanging out with friends until their attitude improves. For older kids, have them write about a time when someone was rude to them and how it made them feel. Regardless the consequence let it fit the offense.

Also be aware of what your child is exposed to. This could be television, bad friends, music choices, and movies just to name a few. You don’t want someone or something else setting an example for your child; it may just be a bad one.

Another thing to keep in mind is telling them why each manner is important. This helps the child understand the importance of good manners. It doesn’t make them mindless robots just doing what they are told. They are learning a core value, one they can carry with them for the rest of their lives. This also helps them make a good decision even when exposed to ill-behavior.

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