What do fishnet stockings, helmets and broken legs have in common? They're all part of the arsenal of Roller Derby. This knock-down girl-on-girl display of athleticism on wheels is kicking Philly's ass in a good way and it's no surprise once you take at look at these tough chicks.
Violet Tempter (more on her name later) thinks "many women love the visceral nature of what roller derby provides: speed skating combined with full-contact body hitting. Not only that, it gives women an outlet to express their physicality and more aggressive sides. Most of the women who join roller derby now are very independent, intelligent, "take no shit" women. This sport fills the niche for us perfectly."
Back in the day, roller derby was thought of as WWF on roller skates scripted plays that are rehearsed so that no one actually gets hurt. Darth Hater #13 explains, "While it [the rehearsed moves] added flair and excitement to the game, we don't need it. We play hard and we love it. That's all the excitement that our fans need."
How can you tell they are really taking these hits? The Philly Roller Girls currently have two broken legs, numerous pulled knees, and a girl in physical therapy for a shoulder injury. After most bouts (that's derby lingo for "game") there are more black and blues (and greens and purples) than can be counted.
"It would be great to find a chiropractor or massage therapist to sponsor us" Darth Hater slyly adds.
"There is nothing typical about our bouts," clarifies Bettie Machete, "it's the good, the bad and the ugly all rolled into one exciting event! Nothing is staged or scripted - if there is a fight, it is real. Tempers fly and everyone wants to win. If someone hits you hard, you will hit them harder. The girls skate hard and hit hard. This is not for primadonnas. Girls will go home battered and bruised - but with a big smile on their face."
But what is the appeal to half-naked women speed skating and slamming into each other? Besides the obvious sex appeal, it's not every day that you see women being so aggressive, combined with speed skating and athletic/gymnastic maneuvers to avoid injury and to and score some points while still looking hot in the process.
The Philly Roller Girls is comprised of four teams: The Broad Street Butchers (meat cleaver wielding, bloody apron wearing maniacs), The Hostile City Honeys (tough biker chicks), The Heavy Metal Hookers (like to rock and look good while doing it), and the Philthy Britches (wanted a historical Philadelphia themed name.) They began in March 2005 when some of the girls in another league decided to break away with hopes to form an LLC (Limited Liability Corporation, or skater owned and operated.) Throughout Philly, fifteen girls of all ages and backgrounds heard the roller derby call to action and attended the first meeting.
"In March we did not have a rink to call home. One phone call to Camden's Millennium Skate Center landed us a welcoming home. This is a real sport and we've trained hard for it. I'm so proud of all our girls and to think back to the beginning - there is no comparison!" boasts Betty Machete.
The creative names don't end with the team monikers though; every member of a Roller Derby team is given a name unique to her alter-ego on the track and a name that's inimitable to everyone else in the national league. (Some of my favorites: Annie Christ, Derby Sanchez, and Chainsaw Guts F*ck.)
Besides the fierce names, the Roller Derby wardrobe is a distinctive too. The only mandatory dress code consists of protective gear such as helmets, knee and elbow pads, and wrist guards, but most players toss on some fishnets and itty bitty skirts before heading to the track to kick some ass. Oh yea, mouth guards are "optional."
"I think that it's quite empowering to play a sport in a skirt," adds Violet Temper. "It's like saying, yes I'm a girl but I can still kick your butt and do it while wearing a skirt."
Four hours a week is dedicated to perfecting their endurance, footwork, and honing their derby skillsin between their day jobs as business owners, webmasters, students, textile designers, mechanics, and bartenders to name a few.
In a nutshell, roller derby is a speed race on quad roller-skates (that's four wheels instead of two) with two teams of five skaters per team or 10 total skaters racing around an oval track trying to score the most points. Although the more historically traditional track is banked, the Philly Roller Girls opt to use a flat track.
The bout consists of scoring segments called jams; each jam lasts a maximum of two minutes. The jams can be called off early by a referee for fighting, injury, or equipment malfunction or the lead jammer (the first jammer, or scoring skater, to break through the pack staying in-bounds and without penalty) for reasons such as falling, fatigue, or to prevent the opposing jammer from scoring.
The jam starts in two sections, designated by whistles. At the first whistle, the pack (a pivot, the striped-helmet-wearing blocker at the front of the pack, and three blockers, who are simply trying to stop the opposing jammer) start to skate. When the pack gets 20 feet from the jammers, the second whistle blows and the jammers can then start skating.
Each team scores points when their jammer passes the opposing team's skaters, including the four blockers. The jammer scores one point for each opposing player she passes inbounds and without incurring a penalty.
For a block to be legal, the contact point must be between the shoulder and the hip. You may block an opposing player with your hips, butt, shoulders and upper arms. You may not strike a player with your elbow or forearm and you may not shove or hit them from behind. Illegal blocking will result in a penalty; three minor penalties add up to one major penalty which will send the skater to the penalty box for the next jam, leaving their team one player short. Fighting is a major penalty and will send the instigator directly to the box - as is arguing with a referee, unless you are the captain.
Now, nine months after the Philly Roller Girls formed, their roster has over 40 skaters, they've sold over 800 tickets to their first exhibition bout, a lengthy waiting list of potential new recruits is forming, and the girls have appeared on Fox 29, Channel 10 News, Channel 3 News, as well as in the Philadelphia Inquirer, Philadelphia Daily News, Courier Post, Men's Edge Magazine, a few tattoo publications... and now Philly Edge.
Last words: "The Philly Roller Girls are dedicated, hard working athletes that need your support. Please visit our website www.phillyrollergirls.com to see our league tee shirts and other ways that you can be a part of this helping us bring Roller Derby back to the Philadelphia area after almost thirty years!" Rock on, Darth Hater #13 and all the rest of the Philly Roller Girls.
SIDEBAR
Roller Derby was named to Rolling Stone's "Hot List" this Fall
A&E has even taken a liking to this modest sport. Premiering January 2nd, A&E's Rollergirls (and preempted by the Rock n' Roller Tour, featuring The Donnas, which is making a stop at the TLA on December 17 with "selected Rollergirls cast members") is met with some apprehension from the roller derby-ing community.
"It's a double-edged sword," Violet Temper explains, "it's great that roller derby has been catapulted into such a main stream media avenue, but it will likely exploit the more sensationalistic aspects of the sport and focus on the obvious - the names, the costumes, the parties, etc. It will probably fail to do justice to the amazing amount of work we all bleed into our leagues, and portray the all-women flat track roller derby leagues as parties on wheels."
Darth Hater #13 hopes that it will "open the door for a whole new onslaught of fans and sponsors."
Talk the talk learn to speak Derby
Bout: the actual "game" or compilation of all the jams
Jam: two-minute time frame in which the teams are on the track trying to score points
Jammer: speed skater who starts at the back of the "pack" and tries to race through the pack to achieve "lead jammer" status.
Lead jammer: the first jammer to make it through the opposing team's blockers without penalties or stepping out of bounds
Pack: the four blockers who are trying to keep the jammer from scoring
Pivot: the blocker in the front of the pack that controls the speed of the jam and keeps her pack together; designated by a striped helmet
Whip: a move a blocker can use to propel their jammer further through the pack; the blocker extends her arm to literally whip her jammer and transfer her speed to sling her through the pack to score