by Joyce M. George-Knight

Created on: March 28, 2010

Ah, yes, the movies portray the romance of a younger woman attracted to and adored by an older man. The big screen certainly makes the love affair look inviting, but there is more to the "rest of the story." What are the differences that can wash away the loving feelings later in life? Following the Honeymoon Stage of marriage, the May/December couple may discover that they have little in common to discuss, especially if there are over 15 years separating them. In reality, they are a generation apart. When the Stage of Disillusionment arrives, it is too late. At this point, the attractiveness of the young woman and the sophistication of the older man, and perhaps the larger bank account, add up to less than originally expected for their physical capabilities are far different. Yes, there is much to consider before a couple commits to each other when age is involved.

The Honeymoon Stage is the initial relationship, which is exciting, sexual and full of promising times. Couples are beginning to get to know each other as they explore mutual activities, meet friends and family, and set some goals. What comes next is reality. One might say that husband and wife get down to the nitty gritty. During this Stage of Disillusionment, the serious nature of life surfaces. The deeper the knowledge into who this person is that they married, the more the mood can change. It all depends, of course, upon the individuals and how they accept the information.

Differences in tastes and knowledge about music, history, literature and even activities can rip into the seams of a marriage, when each slides back into his and her own comfort zones. The enjoyment of each others' preferences wares off, as does the desire to constantly please their partner. While such can be the case, like with anything else, there are varying degrees depending upon the individuals.

A couple decades into the marriage, health problems multiply more rapidly for the older partner. Such scenes as the wife being psyched up for a night out on the town, while her husband no longer has the energy nor the stamina to keep up with her, leaves them in turmoil.  The man's sexual ability can be impaired just at the time the woman's is peaking, since the children are grown and not as dependent upon their parents.

All of these things should be seriously and realistically discussed prior to a younger woman and an older man's considerating taking a permanent step in their relationship. It may be best to have a heart-to-heart talk with some older May/December couples to gather their advice into your information resources. Certainly, if you believe and trust in prayer, you can depend on the answers it provides.

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