by writehand

Created on: March 19, 2010

We have all travelled peaks and valleys of friendships, the peaks have kept us connected to them the valleys have made us distant, yet we desperately depend on friends at every age. Whether it is for company, material need and social uplift or for showing off that you are a social butterfly, we all like making friends.

We all have different definitions of friendships according to our experiences. Literally friendship is an association based on understanding. I grew up in a society where people were always scared of friendships. I always got statements like, friends might hurt you; they will use you and disappear once their need is fulfilled, there are no friends only you are your best friend and so on.

Keeping that in mind I was always hesitant to take the initiative when a newcomer joined my class or a new kid appeared in the neighborhood. It was always a bad picture painted at the back of my mind that would camouflage all the qualities of the welcoming person, the new friend.

It was only when I stepped out in the real world, started a life on my own was when I came across new relationships. It was a whole new world to me, a completely new experience. I kept my distance initially because of the precautions fed to me since childhood. But I noticed, the more hesitant I was the more repellent I became. Judging others was like a disease I was inflicted with. In a normal gathering I would keep my cool but at the same time feel a frosty chill indicating me to leave. I started realizing that being judgmental and precautionary moved people away from me.

534 was my apartment, a place that changed my life and blessed me with the art of making friends. Nina my flat mate was a great girl. Our lives were busy and hardly gave us the opportunity to mingle with each other. It was she who taught me how little things could make a big difference even when pacing your life seemed impossible. She left notes on my table, random notes showing her concern as a flat mate. At times when I returned home exhausted and worn out to even eat by myself, there would be a portion of Nina's cooking left for me to taste. How her tiny little efforts touched my soul making me realize what friendship was all about. I learnt that rather than fearing the consequences, it should be the efforts on making others feel special, that we should concentrate on.

When Nina left I got a new flat mate who was totally in contrast to her. It was an uncomfortable living with complete discordance leading to more friction day by day. All thanks to Nina, her positive energy touched me so beautifully that I was smartly able to mend ways with the new flat mate. It did take a lot of patience, but it completely mutated the bitterness into a joy-able calmness, a rapport that filled the emptiness left by Nina.

Since then I've been able to make friends everywhere irrespective of whether I need them or not. It gives me celestial pleasure just to take care of them and make them feel special. Having a large number of friends or just a few doesn't matter, its how you deal with them. The more love you put in the more strong the bond gets.

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