by Corrie Bryant

Created on: March 17, 2010

I normally try not to write articles that are based upon my life. I am not big on talking about myself but I thought this would be a good topic to share with you.

I have been in an almost perfect relationship, with the most amazing guy for the last 14 months. We have both been in previous marriages that have failed, miserably might I say. Both of us are very leery about making that decision again. We do not want to fail again. We have decided that we do want to get married, we love each other so much and feel we are perfect for each other. We hardly ever fight and when we do get into an argument it is resolved rather quickly and effectively. To be honest with you he is the first man I have been with for more than a year and not wanted to strangle.

Every time we have a conversation about getting married, he emphasizes about making sure this is what I really want. He wants me to promise him that we will be married forever and that I will not change. I have always been the kind of person not to make promises I can't keep. I have been made promises in the past that have been broken, so I always said I would not be that way. I always tell him I will do my best but can not promise him that we will be together for ever or that either one of us will not change. As much as I do not want to fail again, I still can not promise him that. I would not want him to make that promise to me either because I understand that people and circumstances do change and that change is uncontrollable.

This is my theory on marriage. Marriage is a big, huge, long leap of faith. No one can say if marriage can last forever. For one thing we are all going to die one day, there for it would not last forever. It may last until death do us part, but not forever. Forever is the near relative of eternity. The next part of my theory is that there are no guarantees in life. Life is much like a Fed Ex package. Even though someone may guarantee that your package will arrive, some tragic event could cause your package not to arrive. It could be an accident or weather but there is still a small possibility that it may not arrive. I feel everything in life is related to that theory. We never know what will happen from one day to the next. We cannot for see the future, so there fore we cannot say a marriage will last forever. The last part of my theory is that people do change. Sometimes for the worst and sometime for the better. Change is an unavoidable circumstance that we all encounter. How we choose to deal with change is the only variable factor. Your hair can change, your skin can change, your entire physical appearance can change. Along with physical changes come mental changes as well. As our lives change, we change right along with it. If you cannot adapt to change you will not make it very far in life or a marriage for that fact.

After explaining my theory to my boyfriend, he seemed a little distant. I think I may have scared him with my brutal truth and honesty. But that's who I am and if he wants to marry me he has to accept that. I don't want you to think I am against marriage and I don't want you to think that divorce is the easy way out. But the way I see it if you love someone enough to marry them, you should love them enough to accept the fact that there is a possibility that person will change. You will also love them enough to know that marriage may not last until death do us part. Sometimes there are unavoidable circumstances that cause divorce. When you love someone enough to want to marry them, that is a chance you will have to take. All you can do is try your best and hope for the best. No one know for sure where the road of life will lead you.

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