by Teresa Feil

Created on: March 15, 2010

My youngest daughter was born in 1983, but I didn't actually know her until 1988. It was then that her dad and I married. She was only 5 years old and a blessing to my life. The first five years of our marriage Alex bounced from house to house. My two older kids lived with us  at that time. Alex wanted to be a part of our family and soon asked to go to court to request a change in her living arrangements.

Life went along pretty well. If you have ever been in a blended family, you know that there are always differences in many areas. You are in love and everyone is on their best behavior then suddenly the honeymoon is over. Reality is, that time takes the shine off of many things including relationships. The older kids have grown and are now on their own. Alex is still in high school and is searching for her own independence. This is where differences in raising children or even handling situations come into play.

Alex and I had a wonderful relationship until then. My stubborn pride refused to move an inch and soon she and I were battling over everything. The day came that the relationship was severed and Alex moved out of our home. For many years she was no longer a part of my life or anyone elses. I had successfully hurt my youngest daughter to the point that she no longer wished to be near us.

Many years passed and the anger and resentment continued to build. My poor husband lived through these years missing out on his daughters life. Reality hit hard and it hit me right smack in the middle of my heart. I was the wrong one, I was the adult and should have acted like one. I was responsible for injuring her and my husband deeply. God knocked me to my knees one day and showed me what I needed to do. It was me that needed to be reprimanded and to ask for forgiveness.

I asked God to bring her home and to give me a second chance. This past year for the first time in eleven years , we were blessed with the presence of our entire family for Christmas. I had for warned all of them that I would be running around with a camera and there would be many pictures taken. By mid morning Alex had called to say that she was sick. My heart broke and I ran outside and screamed in anguish. No-o-o! This is my Christmas and she must be here to share in it.

The day went on and everyone arrived on time and ready for a celebration. Still no Alex. I sent her a text message and asked how she was feeling. Her reply was, " I am almost there." Standing in the cold wind , I waited with

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