by Karen Howe

Created on: February 28, 2010

To define disability hmm that opens up a can of worms. What about if we were to think about it as "I am different and no one else is me"! How novel would that be. To think of disability in any other way is to minimise what the possibilities could be. Since having our son diagnosed with a syndrome (4) years ago I have struggled with the old term “disability.” Take the DIS out of disability and what are we left with, "Ability". The only reason why we should view, and put a name to something is to enable us with information we can share, financial & emotional support which will be required.

We live in a world that has huge barriers dictating what is appropriate and what isn't. Who made the rules up to ensure people feel a lesser person because they act in a certain manner that is highlighted everyday through the social stigma. 

The sooner we accept each other for who we are, and what makes us  tick the better we will all be, and allow people with differences who I think make for a better world come out and show you who they really are. Wouldn’t it be better if someone could stand in the middle of the shopping mall and just scream out because they could, and not have anyone think they were a freak..Could we allow children to cry and have tantrums because that is the only way they can communicate, without parents being frowned upon by judgemental people who’s beliefs have carried on for generations!  What is right, and what is wrong?

We feel very blessed in having our son join us in this life. It has made me a stronger forthright person which is not far from who I already was, so you can imagine and am sure when you read my story you will feel the passion surrounding this topic. Let me give you a verse I read which still moves me.  My child who cannot talk.

I am the child who cannot talk.
You often pity me, I see it in your eyes.
You wonder how much I am aware of - I see that as well.
I am aware of much - whether you are happy or sad or fearful,
patient or impatient, full of love and desire,
or if you are just doing your duty by me.
I marvel at your frustration, knowing mine to be far greater,
for I cannot express myself or my needs as you do.

You cannot conceive my isolation, so complete it is at times.
I do not gift you with clever conversation, cute remarks to be laughed over and repeated.
I do not give you answers to your everyday questions, responses over my well-being, sharing my needs, or comments about the world about me.
I do not give you rewards as defined by the world's standards -
great strides in development that you can credit yourself.
I do not give you understanding as you know it.

What I give you is so much more valuable - I give you instead opportunities.
Opportunities to discover the depth of your character, not mine;
the depth of your love, your commitment, your patience, your abilities;
the opportunity to explore your spirit more deeply than you imagined possible.
I drive you further than you would ever go on your own,
working harder, seeking answers to your many questions with no answers.
I am the child who cannot talk.

(Author unknown)

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