by Chris Tilley

Created on: February 27, 2010   Last Updated: March 30, 2010

Breaking up is hard to do, especially after fourteen months of an intense and torrid love affair. Easily done with gardening is an impossible statement. But when you have transformed a space into a magical garden and shown your former lover the product of her year of love, its effects upon you, and the change she or he has made, the journey is worth the smile.

In the span of losing the single greatest love of my life, I took an empty negative space that was more than an eyesore but a black hole in the apartment yard and made it into something beautiful. And I did even show my inspiration the result and knew her smile, her pride, and her return to warmth for me in the process. Her smile was a moment of grandiose sentiment, and the garden that became of my journey through our love's loss majesty unknown to me until I just did it.

The breakup was tough. We were deeply in love for so long and both were helping one another through difficult periods in our lives. When the breakup first occurred, there was no where to turn for my peace. Everywhere I went for solace was ugly and full of negative space, negative emotion, and empty scenery. Then I had an epiphany one day through the tears, this space could be as positive as I needed to feel.

First a rock garden became. A tree of red lava beset within white marble chips. A sun at the corner and the act of placing the sand handful by handful between the rocks was like therapy. The entire piece within itself was a work of art so therapeutic I will apply this method again to overcome grief and loss in my life. Next were the live plants for depth, warmth, and color.

Border grass arose from the healing vision into the earth to outline the place where the Wandering Jew ground cover would move and migrate with me away from the pain of new barren earth, a place like life with a love freshly loss. To be reclaimed by the royalty of chance next spring would have. To honor the uniqueness of the love being grieved, I placed a yellow shrimp plant as the tall center piece surrounded by Iris of both American and African origins. These plants would bring out the passion, red, when their next bloom saw me perhaps in another torrid chance at a lifelong love. Along the fence I placed Mexican Petunia to reach out into the sun and climb the heights daring like I must to rise above the challenge of shadows. For many would be in the shadows of this lover.

The finishing touches were the burgundy tree-like hibiscus to form an arch over the place

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