by Tena Kight

Created on: February 20, 2010

Don't let anyone convince you that long lasting relationships have to become stale or boring. It takes years to build a truly great love relationship, and those years can be full of excitement. Here are some tips to help keep the fire burning long after the initial spark.

1.  Remember that comfortable doesn't mean lazy.

It's great to know your partner so well for so long that you can relax. You can breathe easier knowing that your relationship has started the next phase. But keep in mind that comfortable doesn't translate into lazy. You might not feel compelled to “impress” each other, but you should still want to “bless” one another. This should get easier over time because you'll know what best brings a smile to your significant other's face. Love is an action verb and the acts of love you offer your sweetie will insure an exciting relationship full of adventure for a life time.

2. Let's get physical.

It's common knowledge that men and women disagree on the details of this subject. But it's no secret that way back to Adam and Eve and all through out history, sex was a part of the love relationship. Exploring each other is a natural desire. It's the ultimate gift to each other, not to be shared outside the relationship. The gift doesn't mean the same if it is being “re-gifted” so to speak.  Long relationships don't have to lack sexual excitement, use that new comfort level to explore ideas you might have been too embarrassed or reserved to act on earlier. Sexual intimacy is like adding fuel to the fire—you’re sure to burn a greater flame. 

3. Vow to get consistently considerate. 

Consider you partner's needs, wants, and feelings. You must know more about your special one's likes and dislikes by now, so be considerate—consistently considerate. Long, loving relationships aren't made up of selfishness and an attitude of complacency will lead to someone feeling alone. The little things you do or maybe don't do are construed as acts of respect. Respect for each other will strengthen the relationship to bring you closer and build trust. Trust in a relationship is the avenue to freedom. The freedom to love without restraint is always exciting. You might find out that you don't know every thing about your partner when they trust you enough to share their innermost secrets. 

4. Know how to be honest, not critical.

Some couples feel they lose their individual identity because they have opted for the “piece at all cost approach” to any disagreements. Each person in a relationship is equally important and that type of silence might cause an emotional blow up one day. Honesty isn't mean spirited or critical. No one wants to be criticized especially by their significant other, but honesty in a relationship an essential part of the commitment. We should feel safe enough to be honest about our feelings and loving enough to shield our partners from harsh criticisms.

Once the relationship has been seasoned with time, a lot of battles have already been picked and fought. And the win, lose, or compromise has already been noted. This leaves more time to nurture the relationship and enjoy each other. Don't think that means you'll never have another war, it just suggests that you'll pick your battles more wisely and fight more fairly. Love can be an exciting new adventure for even the most mature relationships if the people involved use these tips and little of their own imaginations.

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