by KissyO

Created on: February 19, 2010   Last Updated: February 20, 2010

Where's the tab to vote for self-motivation and a sense of pride? If I must choose between money or recognition, I pick recognition. Money doesn't buy happiness in life or in the work place. Recognition, serves to boost someones sense of accomplishment, gives them perspective of whether they are on the right track, makes them feel a part of something bigger than themselves, and at worst, fuel for an elevated, self-indulgent ego trip.

I've worked in positions where I was paid minimum wages up to some that were in excess of what I felt I might be worth. Both jobs left me feeling at times, stressed out, under-appreciated, and gave me no feeling I was contributing in a positive way to my community.

The higher end job allowed me to settle some long overdue bills. But the more I earned, the less I seemed to have. I spent according to the level of pay I was receiving. My children's needs seemed to increase the more money I made. I felt I needed to dress for the financial success, drive a car which showed prosperity, decorate my home in needless things to fill a void I felt. Money would never be enough.

The lower end job wasn't always enough money to cover monthly expenses. My husband and I had to account for every penny. Sometimes not having enough to buy shoes that he and I wore. The shoes looked tacky, but managing to replace the shoes our children needed because they were outgrowing their old ones took priority. We drove a vehicle which had rusted wheel wells, looked as if it would drop in its tracks at any moment. Our home was decorated in garage sale treasures, family castoffs, and sometimes a piece of discarded furniture we found beside the curb after a community sale day. When at certain times during this position, I felt as if it was too much or I needed a change, my boss or a coworker would tell me what a great job I was doing. Either they sensed my turmoil or a greater purpose was being served, those words of encouragement or praise would be enough of a high to keep me contributing to the cause.

Some might say it was the life struggle of day-to-day living which made the lower-paying job more fulfilling. I was raising two kids with a husband I loved and had little time to think of working anywhere else. Or if it was the worry about where the money would come from if I quit, that kept me in the lower-paying job. I have to give credit to the fact I felt a greater sense of worth from the recognition, rather than any raises in pay or bonuses I might have received over the years. A smile across my face, I couldn't withhold and a shade of red blushing my cheeks from embarrassment made receiving praise somewhat hard to take. But the warm, intoxicating feeling from positive feedback kept me coming back and gave me a rush of belonging.

However even as I type recognition the winner of this debate, I still feel self-motivation and an internal sense of pride to be the ultimate compensation. My parents, who never had much money to their names and seldom found the time to compliment one of their nine children on a job well done, instilled in me a knowledge. A fact I find more true as I grow older. Don't look for the pat on the back, the bonus which will never be enough, the title which acknowledges society's seal of success, or a look of adoration in anothers eyes. Those acclamations may or may not come. It is only within your self, that sense of your own self-worth, an inner pride of knowing you strive to do your best, which hits the mark.

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