by Joy Adderton

Created on: February 15, 2010

The smoke was thick as thieves  at the Johnny Mac's Saloon down by the swamp.  Johnny didn’t mind us smoking in his joint because he knew the cops were either too lazy or too scared to drop in, although we all knew it was the later. Still, it was a great place to hang after a long day of hunting .

 It was a bad time for us crocodiles , food was scarce,  I still can't believe I resorted to eating  my cousin Barb’s new born babes while I was babysitting just last week.  I knew she’d never talk to me again but what did I care, just one less Christmas card to write.

I was belly up to the bar drinking my problems away and reminiscing about Elsie, my late wife.  She just picked up one day decided she wanted the city life, said she wanted to make something of herself in the big 'ole city of New York.  Well I guess she got what she wanted in some sad way , she made something of herself alright,  She got herself made into one of those  fancy purses for some snooty lawyer lady on the upper east side.  Poor sweet naïve Elsie.   

Just as I asked Johnny to hit me up another drink, she walkes in, legs up to her ears and eyes as big as cow patties.  An absolute face of a doe, a deer , ya she was a female deer alright.    All eyes were on her and every tooth was dripping with saliva, they all wanted a piece of her.  She was gonna be the all you could buffet only she didn't know it yet.  The dame was obviously lost  and before the smoke could clear I whisked her out the back door, she never even thought to fight because the moment our eyes met, we had chemistry,  I mean the crazy fireworks kind of chemistry you only get to experience once in a life time.

It wasn’t long after that we were married,  me the one with the words “Never Again” tattooed on my upper bicep.  Go figure, I guess love really is blind, anyway we had a lovely honeymoon along the shores of the Bayou.

That would a great ending to any fairy tale right there but that ain’t my story.   You see travelling home I began to realize I hadn’t eaten a thing since our courtship began, guess you could say I was living on love or something like that.  I was so hungry I could of ate the backside of a baboon.

To make a long story short, if you’ve never tried venison, I highly recommend it, that stuff’s freaking amazing!

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