by Christine Sandor

Created on: February 12, 2010

Who doesn’t like to hear how wonderful they are and what a genius they are at all they do? Everyone wants “warm fuzzies” and positive feedback, but with the good often comes the not so good.  Others, especially bosses, always seem to find what is not right and are quick to point it out.  So how do you handle negative criticism? There are a few simple rules to keep in mind when you find yourself under the gun of criticism.

It’s not about you.

People are tempted to personalize every negative thing we hear about our performance or actions. In reality, if you really think about it, the criticism is about what you are doing, or how you are doing it.  This is true even if the disapproval is about how you are dressing or wearing your hair. It is about choices and actions you may be making but not about the person you truly are inside. This concept takes time to believe, but if you can step back and see the criticism in this manner that simple degree of separation will help you put things into perspective.

Is it really negative?

One person’s negative criticism is another persons’ positive reinforcement! Take a look at how you are labeling things. People are quick to use the words “good” and “bad” but what if there really was no “bad”? Humans make decisions on what is good and bad based on how they perceive an event or statement affecting their world. Eliminating the words “bad” and “negative” from you vocabulary will allow you to refocus on finding the good in everything.  If you are able to begin to look at things you perceive to be negative as really something good, you will begin respond differently.

Turn it around.

No one wants to hear negative criticism, but the fact is, no one is perfect. There are times everyone makes a mistake or perhaps does not do their best work. Any number of reasons can be behind why and the criticism might be looked at as your voice to examine why. Hearing criticism is never easy, but turning it into something positive can be to your benefit.

When your boss criticizes a piece of work, he or she is doing so in an effort to point areas that need improvement so that the quality of your work and the company will both benefit. In the majority of cases negative criticism can be looked at as guidance in ways to spur you on to better habits.  Turning the words around, you will find that the “negative” will become a road to improvement.

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