by SN Bynoe

Created on: February 07, 2010

What To Expect When A Military Spouse Returns From Deployment

The emotional roller coaster is over and now your loved one is coming home.  Anticipation swells within the family because the hardest part is done. However,  before the family rips out the confetti there is a lot that happens when your spouse returns from deployment. His or her arrival is a transitioning period where the individual must turn off their soldier side and be able to adjust back to living at home.

Planning the arrival of  your partner can be a lot of work. There are crucial decisions to be made.  Accommodations for the children, and family must be arranged with in a short period of time.

              It is very important to coordinate this event carefully, considering how your spouse might feel at the moment. Honestly, when my husband came home he just wanted to see his immediate family only. Sometimes crowds can be overwhelming for someone who has just stepped off from a plane overseas. Friends and distant relatives should be sent for at a  later date.This will give the individual time to bond back with the family in a smaller setting. This will also give him or her the opportunity to adjust to regular everyday life.

             The deployed soldier who is returning home is reformed in many ways. Sometimes these changes can either be mental or physical.  It is very important during this time to think positive and encourage your spouse to talk about how he or she felt while overseas. When your significant other is speaking to you always listen. Never be judgmental nor put your two cents in. After dealing with dangerous situations overseas, most soldiers just need someone to lend an ear with out criticism.Open discussion is a very therapeutic method of being able to clear the air, strengthen your bond as a couple and also refer your partner to the proper sources if he or she needs it.

               Household duties will probably stay the same for sometime. When a spouse is reentering back in to the home it takes them some time to adapt.  Wages return back to the way in which they were before deployment. Earned income decreases,  so its necessary that you and your partner come up with a budget that coincides with expenses such as clothing, food,  and car payments. This will prevent your family from falling victim to debt and even bankruptcy. 

Soldiers receive days of leave. During this time it is important to have a combination of both family  time and private time with  your partner. In this way no family member is neglected nor left behind.

*Proper planning , budgeting , and  interacting with your spouse will help the homecoming to run smoothly. However smoothly doesn't necessarily mean perfectly. When feeling frustrated or nervous allow yourself to relax and take a break. Change is never easy and but it is important to remember that everything falls in place with time and patience.

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