by Jeana Marie Balintec

Created on: February 04, 2010

Past is past. Our romantic past may have brought us extreme happiness or even pain but it made us into a better person for our respective partners.

Personally, as a sign of respect to your spouse, things that have happened in the past should remain in the past. There is really no more need to go into details and tell every special event that you and your ex have been through. No need to discuss the problems that might have led to the break-up. No need to discuss about the traits you loved the most. No need to share the special songs that you shared, the pictures that you kept, the letters that you have collected.

I think it is much better if you will try to learn from the mistakes that you might have done. Try to become a better partner to your spouse so that the same thing that had happened with you and your ex will not happen anymore.

Respect begets respect. What would you feel if your wife or your husband tells the smallest detail of all his romantic past? Would you be okay with that? I’m pretty sure, you won’t. It might even be a reason for arguments and discussions.  The relationships that we had have reasons why it ended. The only thing that we can do is try to avoid doing the same mistakes, one of that is not giving enough respect to the person you are with now, by discussing everything that has happened in the past.

Past is past. It’s time to move on. It's time to build new memories, not to continue with the old one. It's time to burn bridges. It's time to prove to your spouse that your decision to settle down with him or her was not based on the ill-feelings the past might have brought and caused you. It's time to show that the past doesn't matter anymore. That whatever happened in the past will just remain there. Saying it is much easier than doing it. But it is worth a try.

The world can be a happier place if we try to focus on what we have now and not try to focus on what we had or what we could have been. Our past relationships can either bring goodness or problems to us. So it's your choice. Would you gamble what you have now all for what you had in the past? You decide.

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