by Ellie Copper

Created on: February 03, 2010

First dates can be nerve wrecking. What to wear? What to talk about? How to act? What not to talk about? Our minds race with potentials. Our first date can be either start of something great or a huge disaster. It all depends on how well you mesh with each other. So here are some tips, on how to keep it cool and smooth.

1 - Location. Where ever you go, make it a relaxed setting. Somewhere where you can talk and have a genuine conversation. It can be fun and energetic, but just make sure there is the opportunity to converse. Cafes are a great setting. Even some restaurants. Don't go where there is a dress code and stay away from going to the movies.

2 - Don't Drink. Alcohol can be a great ice breaker, but using an aid to break the ice may make you seem weak and unnerved. Save the drinking for a second or third date.

3 - Find Common Ground. Ask your date questions and don't interrupt. See what interests you both have in common. Do talk about yourself, but limit it to allow an equal conversation. If your date is talking a bit too much, break it up. Throw your opinion in whenever you get a chance and change the topic to something more opinion based like favorite movies or books. Ask more questions. Don't just sit, smile and nod. Show interest.

4 -Stay Away from Serious Topics. Polite conversation stays away from religion and politics. The first date is not the forum in which to bring these topics up. Respect your date and stay away from these topics. And if you date brings them up, kindly remind them that these topics are not good first date material. You should talk about your family. But only at a glance. Do not get to involved in talking about your siblings and parents. You don't want to air out your families dirty laundry. And stay away from hypothetical situations. Don't ask or talk about having children. This can scare people away on first dates. And stay away from the Ex. Don't mention any of your exes on your first date. It is a very impolite thing to do. Your date will automatically think you are comparing them to every single ex that you've had. A first date does not need that kind of judgment involved.

5 - Don't stress out about the Kiss! You'll know if you want to kiss your date about halfway into the date. It won't be that should I or shouldn't I quest, but more of a where and when? Guys should take their queue from your date. Let her make the choice and don't force it out of her. Ladies, if your going to kiss him, hold it for the end or very close to the end of the date. Don't start a make out session in the middle of your booth before you leave a restaurant. Keep your distance during the date. Anything closer than arm in arm should be held off till a later date. The signals we give are definitely noticed by our dates. For a first date, I am always in favor of holding hands. Its a simple gesture, but it speaks volumes. Let him go for the hand. When you do go for the kiss, keep it simple. Don't over complicate it.

These tips will almost ensure that a date will at least go well, even if there is no follow up date.

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