by Jim Bessey

Created on: January 17, 2010

You're sure it's over, and now you need to know how to break up with your girlfriend. Who said "breaking up is hard to do"? It might have been Neil Sedaka, and he was right. You'd like to end your relationship without looking like a complete jerk. Maybe the two of you could even remain friends. But how?

Unless you are a heartless creep, don't break up with her by phone, email or text message. Those are all too easy. Real men do things face to face. Don't tell whopping lies, either. Bite the bullet, and try one of these time-tested methods for breaking up with your girlfriend.

♥The "it's not you, it's me" dinner

Bring your Visa card and treat your girlfriend to dinner at a fancy restaurant. Show her she's worth it. Be hesitant and apologetic. Tell her how wonderful she is, and then ease into the reasons why you aren't good enough for her. The break-up is all your fault; she's an angel. This is a classic, and it works.

♥The "long drive for a heartfelt talk"

Show her some scenery before you break up with her. Drive like a gentleman. Play some music from a station she likes. Buy your girlfriend ice cream from a roadside stand. Be a little moody, so she'll know something's up. Eventually, when you're fairly close to home, open up with the old "I've been thinking..." line. Men don't think, so she'll get the message quickly.

♥The "it's time for good-bye breakfast"

Make it a "breaking up with your girlfriend" business breakfast. Have her meet you at a busy diner. Be pleasant, but assertive. Don't be afraid to say, "It's over, and I'm sorry." Offer logical reasons like "I've decided I don't want to be in a relationship with anyone right now." Maintain eye contact, and don't shed any false tears. Keep the whole thing level-headed, and have something scheduled right after breakfast.

♥The "break-up movie break-up"

For the less assertive guy, use a movie as inspiration to end the relationship. If you can't find the right flick at the theater, rent something appropriate and invite your girlfriend to your place. Consider "Annie Hall," or search the Net for "top 10 break up movies." Share some popcorn, and laugh in all the right places. Empathize with the characters' anguish. When the time feels right, you "suddenly" realize that the film is about the two of you. Take your cues from the movie, and let your break-up seem perfectly natural.

♥Share some "good-bye lovin' "

This break-up method is tricky, despite its frequent use. Your girlfriend might despise you for it, but it's a risk worth taking. Ideally, do this at her place - so you can leave if things backfire. Do everything you normally do together, no hints (in case you change your mind). This final expression of the love you've shared should be all about her, not you. Afterward, tell her how good it's been, but that things have "run their course." Make sure you know exactly where your clothing is.

Can the two of you still be friends after you break up? Maybe. If you break up with your girlfriend thoughtfully and honorably, she might still respect you in the morning.

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