by Kriszia Vengua

Created on: January 07, 2010

Should you feed the wedding vendors at your reception?

The answer is that you don't have to, but good manners dictate that you should. 

First of all, there is no rule requiring you to feed wedding vendors at the ceremony.  This is their job, and you are paying them to be there. In fact, some vendors even mention it in their brochure or website FAQs that you don't have feed them, just to save clients the dilemma of asking.  

But while feeding them may not be a requirement, it certainly is a nice gesture.  And as people who has strived to make your wedding memorable, it's only polite to do so. 

I know what some are thinking: it's too expensive.  I don't know them anyway. This is their job. If I feed them, then why shouldn't I feed the wait staff too?

But the waiters are only there for a day, other vendors who are there, such as the wedding planners and the photographers, are people you may have worked with for months.  These are the same people who have stressed with you on the details of your coming nuptials, so it's only right they at least be offered meals and drinks during their reprieve. 

It doesn't even have to be the same food.  If you're worried about the additional wedding costs because you elected to have the steak dinner that goes for $200 a pop, then get them the $60/plate chicken.  Or talk to your planner about it, and she can even negotiate a more cost effective, and plain menu with your caterer.  Better yet, get them a clubhouse sandwhich and a chance at the bar once the event is over. 

Sure, it's cheaper, but it's really the thought that counts.  Most wedding vendors do not eat during the event anyway, since they are busy working.  So they need something fast and portable to eat, or just something filling at the end of the event. Since after four hours (or more!) of running around, making sure your wedding is a success, they are bound to famished!  

And at the end of the day, a the reception is really a big party aimed at sharing your happiness for being united in marriage.  So why not share it with them? Paid or not, as people who worked to make your day memorable, is a sandwhich really a big thing to ask?

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