by Kristin Schaaf

Created on: January 07, 2010

Do not let the sun go down on your anger.

This is a phrase to live by. When we immediately address our angry emotions, we are much less likely to burn bridges in our relationships with others. And, we are much more likely to deal with and communicate our emotions in a healthy manner.

Anger that builds over time leads to destruction of the self and relationships.  It pushes people away and isolates the person who is angry into bitterness.

When an issue is immediately addressed, misunderstandings and miscommunications can be quickly resolved. However, often times in our anger we don’t want to talk about or address the situation; we would rather bottle up our emotions and avoid confrontation. Our anger towards the other person can consume our thoughts, making us angry in our daily lives and as we deal with others. You can then easily become an angry person, carrying a chip on your shoulder, bitterness in your heart and isolation in your soul. You’ll push not only the person you were angry with away, but others in your life as well. This is how our anger can build up over time, causing us to become bitter and burn bridges with others, destroying our relationships.

It is imperative for the sake of the relationship of the person you are angry with, as well as for your relationships with others, that you address your anger in a timely manner. It is no secret that communication is key to a healthy relationship, and communicating your anger is no different.

Obviously it is difficult to communicate our anger, especially in the heat of the moment. You may need some time to cool off in order to communicate in a tactful and loving manner. What is important is that you let the other person know how you feel and tell them what they did to make you angry. What could have caused you to become furious could have been a simple miscommunication. It is important to communicate your anger with an open heart and willingness to extend forgiveness and grace to the other person. This is what keeps our relationships strong and healthy.

Anger is a very powerful emotion that, when left unaddressed, can leave us isolated in bitterness, pushing others away and destroying our relationships. But it doesn’t have to be that way. We have the choice of dealing with our emotions positively, addressing our anger immediately and keep our relationships strong.

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