by Lynette Bell

Created on: January 06, 2010

Speaking from experience, I would have to say yes, virtual relationships can take precedence over real life relationships.  No matter what the situation in our real life home or work place, our true virtual home is lived in the mind, and it is within this virtual home, that a virtual online relationship can slowly and easily begin to take precedence in our reality, many times unknowingly.   Even if our daily reality is a happy and well rounded one with no apparent missing pieces, the virtual mind can compartmentalize the online relationship just by virtue of it's physical absence alone, and slowly but surely grow it's roots into our daily reality, and, before it is realized, choice's can begin to be made influenced by the growing virtual life online.

The virtual realm of the computer is very similar to the virtual mental realm of the mind.  What we perceive in both realms takes place within a virtual reality that cannot be seen in the physical life we lead everyday.  And, more times than not, what goes on in the virtual reality of the mind is what guides our life's path.  Our secrets, hopes, dreams, memories and goals all dwell within the confines of our virtual home of the mind, and it is from these perceptions and influence that many of our daily choice's are made into reality.     

So, it is no wonder that a virtual relationship began online can be an even more insidious influence on our daily reality than we are aware and even begin to take precedence within it.  The mind has a natural built in awareness with those we have daily interactions with but not so with the seemingly innocent virtual lives we are growing online daily. 

Life is not as cut and dry as the material world would have us think.  The virtual world is as real as the material world to the mental mind, and we would be better equipped to handle it if we were more aware of this fact.  Possibly, many heartaches and relationships destroyed by online relationships, could be circumvented by this knowledge and awareness.   In the meantime, one way we can personally take action in becoming more aware of a virtual relationships influence, is to begin to be more open and honest with our loved ones about the connections we are growing online.  After all, if we have already put in the time, effort and hard work growing our current lives, we owe it to ourselves and our families to nip the virtual relationships influence in it's virtual bud.  If we are having problems at home or in the work place, honesty with out loved ones or coworkers is still the best policy.  

This is not to say we shouldn't grow relationships online.  Many wonderful lifetime relationships have been grown in this virtual environment, including many helpful networking relationships that eventually lead to bigger and better things.    But, red flags and caution signs should be popping up in our mental radar screens if we have already begun to compartmentalize and live double lives with our virtual "friend" whom we have kept secret from our loved ones.  If you are on this road already, please be forewarned, it is a dangerous road and should be taken as seriously as a real life relationship...after all, your mind already has.

Learn more about this author, Lynette Bell.
Click here to send this author comments or questions.