by Holly Rogers

Created on: December 29, 2009

Moving in together is a major, life changing decision many couples face at some time in their relationship. This can be a scary step if you have never lived with a partner before, or if perhaps you are moving straight out of the family home and into a home with your partner. The transition can also be extremely expensive if one or both partners have few belongings of their own to bring to the combined household. However, if both partners have all the essential items for living in their own house, the challenge often becomes trying to decide which item to keep and what to do with the left over items.

This situation brings to mind an episode in season 3 of How I Met Your Mother. The main character Ted is about to move in with his girlfriend after living in a share apartment with friend's since after college. He is slowly backing his things into boxes, only for one of the female characters to comment that his partner may not even let him keep any of his stuff. Ted then becomes very sentimental and defensive at the thought of letting go his valued, but useless items. This would be a common experience for many men and even a lot of women when it comes time to move in with your partner for the first time. There are certain possessions that may be worthless, but their sentimental value is through the roof. For this reason it is important both partners are considerate, but compromising, when it comes to parting with possessions.

The most logical plan of attack when deciding whose possessions to keep and whose to dispose of when moving in together is to go with age and condition. If your partner has a one year old four slice toaster, in perfect working condition, whereas you have a ten year old two slice toaster which seems to burn toast, its obvious which item to keep and which to loose. Take this tactic with all household appliances. Occasionally it does not hurt to keep a back up, but generally you will only need one of each.

When it comes to decorational items or useless clutter, it is time for both of you to be strict and part with anything that will not fit in with your new home. It may be a good idea to discuss the type of decor you wish to have in your new home first and see if these items fit into that theme. If not, it may be time to say goodbye. This can be the most difficult time for many and may be a cause of many fights. A great solution for controlling the conflict is to each have a room in the house you can decorate as you please. For him, it may be a spare bedroom/office style room where you can hang music posters, display football trophies and store that Darth Vadar statue. For her, it may be a lounge or dining area where decorative vases, tableclothes and ornaments look pretty and suitable.

After the big cull is done, if you have time, have a garage sale and try and make some money on the unwanted items. You may end up making enough money to purchase a much wanted item for the house. This is a great opportunity to upgrade items in your household and make the most of your clean out together. It is also a nice chance to bond by purchasing the first 'ours' items for your new home together.

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