by Natasha Grigorash

Created on: December 28, 2009

This is my favorite topic. I have spent years researching this issue! So, first of all, I must say, that, in my opinion, there are two things that influence our values – the environment we are in and our thoughts.

Let us begin by thinking about our childhood. When a child is born unto the world, their mind is a complete blank. They have nothing, no thoughts, no understanding, no values. Mostly, the first ever experience that they have is the care of their mother. I remember reading in one of those psychology books that the extent to which a mom spends time with her newborn determines how well a person will respond to other people once they grow up, especially when it comes to trust. So it’s number 1, the experiences of the first year of life are number one factor in determining a young person’s priorities. Gradually as a child’s development progresses, they have more and more going on around them. At that early stage all a person can do is soak everything that’s going on around them, so that’s number 2. What do they see? Do they see kind, loving people around them, or constant fights and hatred? A little bit extreme, a person might not even remember those first years of their life, but it will be a huge factor in their future development.

Most of the stuff a child knows they learn from their parents, so that brings me to my next point. According to behaviorist psychology, the environment is the determining factor in a values formation process. Your circumstances determine to some degree the kind of person you become. So let’s think about it. Have you ever noticed that looking at a person’s background and where they have spent most of their time will tell you a lot about them? That includes a person’s childhood (where they lived, how they’ve been parented, what kind of school they went to, most importantly when they were raised, because people who grew up in the 70’s will probably differ significantly from those who grew up in the 80’s etc.), their overall education (one of the main determinants of your values, the place where they studied, what they studied, what they have learned), their occupation (where they work, what kind of work environment they are in), the people that person spends most of their time with (“tell me who your friend and I will tell you who you are”, people constantly influence each other in their daily interactions and oftentimes without realizing it they

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