by Michelle Shelton

Created on: December 28, 2009   Last Updated: December 29, 2009

I LOVE teenage girls. I have two and a 23 year old. They are a delight. They are all three quite different from each other. I think it has been easy to raise them. I have allowed them to be honest with me from day one. I constantly tell them I trust them and I am honored to be their mother. I think this works.

You see, the best thing I can do for all of my children is see them bigger than they see themselves. I tell my daughters how beautiful they are and then I make sure they know I am not simply talking about the outside. I am talking about what is on the inside...character. It is available to all of them. Honesty, virtue, love, kindness and compassion.

My 23 year old was the most difficult. She is the oldest. I found out everything that didn't work with her. I choose not to find mistakes with how I parent. I choose to categorize what works and what doesn't work. The thing is, what didn't work with her, may work with one of the others. There is no formula that is right each time. Kids are funny like that.

When my girls were small, I taught them about sex. I explained what feminine products were. I taught them about their bodies and explained what would happen to them and when. I shared things with them when they were curious and always in terms they could understand. I explained to them that their body was beautiful and sacred and they would want to protect it for someone very special when they are married.

I did not allow their father to talk harsh to them or spank them when they were young. I asked him to teach them everything he would want their husband to do for them because they will most likely pick a husband like their father. He agreed. My girls are all wonderfully responsible. They don't do drugs or smoke. They don't have boyfriends. They simply enjoy being teenagers. I have always told them I was excited for them to be teenagers as it was a wonderful time for mothers and daughters to talk and stay close. They thought this was what would happen and guess what....it has.

Whatever you want it to be like...talk to your child about that. They will think it is normal. So many parents talk about how bad teenagers are and how awful it is going to be. The kid rises to the occasion and gives the parents exactly what they expect. Maybe as parents we could simply change our expectations? I think it could be enough. What do you think?

Learn more about this author, Michelle Shelton.
Click here to send this author comments or questions.