by Mabel Jane

Created on: December 26, 2009

Sometimes, you can't help who you love- even when it risks your job. When most of your day is spent at work, it is not hard to develop romantic feelings for a coworker. However, dating in the workplace can be a touchy situation that- if not handled in a mature and proper way- can put your relationship and your job in danger. To make sure that does not happen, try a few simple steps that will make things easier for everyone involved.

Do Your Research

Most employee information packets include rules on dating in the workplace. They also include sections on sexual harassment- a topic both parties should consider and discuss before deciding to date. You may also want to see if there have been inter-office relationships in the past and how they were handled. Knowing what to expect, what rules there are and how to approach the subject and with who is a great way to start taking care of this in the best, least problematic way possible.

Do Think Realistically

Everything is always great in the beginning, so it is hard to think about what would happen if things go wrong. However, before you start an office romance, you should think about problems that may arise from dating a coworker. Ask yourself questions like: Will I be able to see this person every day if we break up? Will seeing this person all the time at work make other times less- special? Will we be able to handle office rumors and work politics? Will we be able to handle competition at work? How would we handle one of us excelling at work and not the other?

Before you decide to take a work crush to the next level, make sure you think about all of the complications that may come from working with your significant other.

Don't Try to Hide it

Once you decide to date someone in the workplace, make sure to inform someone in Human Resources. It is better to be open and honest with them, rather than trying to keep it a secret. It is better that HR find out from you in a meeting with them, than to find out from someone else, in a different setting. They may see it as disrespectful and it could even be grounds for firing. If you are honest with HR, it will show them that you are not only serious about your job, but serious about the relationship as well. They may also be able to give you tips on dating in the workplace and tell you the do's and dont's of dating based on the rules set forth by the company.

It is also good to have all of this on record from another source or witness. If the relationship ends badly and there is resentment, your ex may try to get back at you by filing sexual harrassment charges. By having documentation that both parties acknowledged the relationship, you may be able to save yourself.

Do Keep it Out of the Office

Just because Human Resources and maybe some coworkers know about the relationship, you should not flaunt it all over the office. That means no hand holding or other personal displays of affection, which could make other coworkers feel awkward and uncomfortable. Also, do not bring your problems into the workplace. Your coworkers will get annoyed and it could have a negative influence on your work. Remember, work is work. You should always separate your work from your private life.

Though, at most work places, inter-office relationships are looked down upon, Human Resources and other staff know that dating in the workplace may be inevitable. If the topic is handled with respect to all parties, it can really help foster a responsible and stress-free relationship.

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