by Toni Foyer

Created on: December 20, 2009

Why did dating always feel as if you were about to go on a job interview? You can’t let your weaknesses show and you need to be on your best behavior at all times. The actual ritual of dating can be exciting yet dreadful all at the same time.

 I remember a time in my early twenties, before my husband, when dating became like a sport for me, and for many of my girlfriends. How many men can we juggle at once without exposing the truth about us and our scheming ways. Of course, my girlfriends and I felt that dating as many men as possible was just playing it safe or just giving guys a dose of their own medicine. It was fun. But, what happens when you really fall for a guy and you want to be with him and only him? This is a dilemma. Should I expose myself and let him know my true feelings or go with the flow. Well, let me tell you ladies, when you fall in love, no other man compares to him. The other men you’re currently dating become insignificant and you suddenly begin to cancel dates and focus on the man you really want.  Dropping your guard for this man is no longer taking a chance but just feels right.

 This time I knew I met the man I was going to marry. I was tired of the dating scene and all the games that came with it. We had a college class together and the chemistry between us was invigorating. All the innuendos and the flirtations had sparked some sort of fire in us. It was inevitable that we would begin to date and eventually fall head over heels with one another.

 It was a tumultuous relationship. Our passion for each other was unbound and so was our discontent from one another. There were trust issues and commitment issues which caused us to break-up many times. But, it was Christmas time and somehow we were able to breakthrough all the nonsense and all the baggage and just start to love each other. Dating was fun again for me. Instead of wasting time on all the trivial things, we actually spent the time on making our relationship work. It still wasn’t easy. We both still had our hang ups and quirks, but after five years of dating, we finally tied the knot. So after dating a variety of guys and playing the immature mind games that go along with dating, I finally found the one.

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