by Georgina.S

Created on: December 18, 2009

I received many raised eyebrows when I expressed my personal view that moving in together before marriage is often not the best idea. Sure, I have heard many arguments ranging from "How do you know if your partner is right for you if you do not try living together" to "It is in the best economic interest of both dating parties to live together". There are always pros and cons in every argument and here are my reasons to support my view that moving in together before marriage will not be the best idea you have had.

The one most precious thing all should embrace before marriage is freedom. As a child, most of us live with our parents, following their rules and curfews. In a marriage, most people have to work hard to compromise their different beliefs, views and ways of living.  We spend most of our lives either cramping our style or compromising. The only time when we get to breathe free and be ourselves is the transitional period of moving out of your parents' home to settling down when you have found your other half. Given this very short window of freedom we have, why would anyone throw that out in a hurry?

So, you ask me, "How do I know if the other person is right for me if I do not move in with him/her?". I think this can be easily overcome with more phone calls, more dinner dates, stay in movie nights and sleepovers. Most of our parents never lived together before marriage, yet we have to admit that marriages of their generation seems to last way longer than the marriages in our generation.

Have anyone ever wondered if, perhaps they were doing something right? That perhaps our "tried and tested" method might not be the best way to ensure a lasting marriage?That perhaps, when two people in love do not live together until they get married, they work harder to keep the relationship going until they reach the goal they set for themselves in the relationship and in the process, they learn to keep the same attitude going on even after marriage. 

Many people say that Marriage is the Tomb of Love. In the same way, moving in together could spell doom for the relationship. How many times have you heard women complaining that their partners stopped romancing them once they move in together and from the hot sex siren she felt she was, she starts to feel as desirable as the couch in the living room? Or vice versa, men complaining that they felt trapped and do not understand why their sweet girlfriends start to nag worse than their mothers?

The problem stems

• 1
• 2
• Next Page >>