Angst. This is the one word that can universally describe all the years before middle age. The older we get, the more it dissipates and is replaced by joy, love of life, and unadulterated self-satisfaction.
Have you ever caught yourself covered in a cold sweat worrying about an upcoming exam, only to remember that you graduated from school several decades earlier? How about all those times you sat wondering when you would stop sitting at home alone, while everybody else was out clubbing or going out on dates. What about all those times you were worried what your parents might say, if they found out what you were up to?
One day you wake up and realize that the only person you have to answer to is yourself. Even your parents have no jurisdiction on your life choices. All they can do is sit and give opinions. All of a sudden, when you have something to say, people listen as though you were an adult... because somewhere along the line you have become one.
Children look at you with eyes wide open, looking for guidance. Even the hoods who have no respect for anybody stop for just a second because even they know you've earned more street cred than they have, simply by virtue of being older.
When we are children, few things are within our control. Our parents, caregivers, and teachers dictate every hour of our days. We may like it or we may not but, ultimately there aren't too many things we get to decide for ourselves.
As we age, we start to rebel. It is less about disagreeing with the choices being made for us, and more about taking control over our own lives. Problem is that not all that many people have the faintest idea as to what to do with all that control, once we get it. Even while attending Colleges and Universities, most of us are still trying to find a direction and hoping that things will iron themselves out eventually.
Some people can still boast at having "high-school sweethearts." But, many are plagued by the idea of their lack of love found and wonder when or if it will ever happen for them. Increasingly, more and more adults still feel this way into their 30s and 40s.
Right around the time that we become too old to have kids, we start to settle into the niche we've carved out for ourselves. So much of the uncertainty in life has to do with not knowing if we will ever have children, and how many. When that is no longer a concern, we can stop living in the realm of possibilities and just start living.
Yes, we have all heard about the 'crotchety old man' or 'bitter old woman' but, the reality is that those are the squeaky wheels. The majority of people are more happy in the winters of their lives. This is the only explanation for why a grandparent can patiently and blissfully allow their children and grandchildren to take center stage and lead the way, acting as though without them the grandparent would not be able to find their own way.
The young are always trying to teach those senior to them what is what. They are asserting their independence, their education, and their skills. They are competing. They think they are winning. The only thing is that the other side isn't playing the same game. They know that they were once young and did the same thing, and that those senior to them, let them do it.
That lack of competition, lack of drive to achieve goals that have long since been realized is what finally allows us to actually stop and smell those roses we've been planting and tending for years. Naturally, we are happier as we age, because every road we took and every choice we made brought us to this spot on Earth. We must admit, that the decisions we made were the best ones we could have made at the time. For that reason there are no regrets only love of live and gratitude for the opportunity to live it.