by Melody Hearndon

Created on: December 16, 2009   Last Updated: December 17, 2009

The word no is powerful. It's simple, yet its delivery can be the difference between how one feels about themselves or how one feels about the person that speaks it with such passion. As an example, saying no I can't help you with that project as I'm overwhelmed now myself, is not the same as saying no I won't help you…no explanation necessary. 

As we perform our duties on the job and take on extra responsibility, others look upon us as though we have super powers and abilities. We never say no, and we always seem willing to go above and beyond what's required. Your fellow co-workers either envy you or they speak unkindly behind your back. Using it to their advantage goes without saying.

So often what happens is you become the “go to” one because everyone knows you won’t say no. If someone is behind or lagging in their duties, it’s understood that they can bring it to you knowing you won’t say no. Why is that? No is a word that demands respect and its due place in the workplace environment.

Using the word no is all about delegating specifics and setting limits. So often the word no is negative in its connotation. As a child we can all remember being told no, and questioning the reason when in fact it was often for our own wellbeing and good. When it was heard more often then not…its meaning completely changed.

Those that are in position of authority yield power and control, and using the word no is part of that authority. In an office environment or workplace situation, there comes a time when the word no can be your best defense. No can set up a perimeter that speaks to others that boundaries are in place. Part of boundaries professionally and personally is being willing to say no…and mean it.

There are those in society that feel the need to please on a constant basis. It’s how they garner their self-worth. They are known as people pleasers and they lack understanding that limits exist. Multi-tasking takes on an entirely different function when done by people pleasers. They’ve taken on too much so they deceive themselves into thinking nobody else will notice.

Is your desk or bench or work environment looking as though they need to call in The National Guard? Have you paper-weights arranged on your desk according to theme or importance? Have you gone so far as to work off the clock thinking that you're making progress? These are but a few examples as to why it's necessary to learn to say no.

Saying no is clearly and simply conveying to others that you work within certain limits and follow these limits so as not to overwhelm yourself and those you work with. It’s a common courtesy that states how you value your position and those you work with, and it allows for less stress in an already stressful environment.

We all have work ethics and personal morals and values that we bring into our place of employment. Make known what those ethics are from the beginning and don't allow others to take advantage of your good nature and willingness to help. There's a difference between helping out in a pinch, and being the “door mat” so to speak.

When taking on projects, be mindful of what you're capable of completing. Be a team player who has a reputation for delivering what is desired or expected in the end. As our career's advance and word of mouth spreads, it's by your actions that those words are as positive as they can be. Think of the word no as a positive response and deliver it as such, and you will find that the word no can carry itself a long way.

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