by Christopher Barratt

Created on: December 12, 2009   Last Updated: December 13, 2009

Bad drivers. Where would the rest of us be without bad drivers? Who would we vent our pent up motorway fury towards if they didn’t exist? There will always be bad drivers as long as the human animal has a hole in its posterior. You see the trouble with bad drivers is the fact they are absolutely scared to death of driving. Male or female it doesn’t matter, there are many among us who will always make a complete hash of it whenever they take to the highways and byways, from people who leave the petrol filler in the tank spout and drive off to those who get stopped when the rear wheels start smoking, usually because the parking break has been on for the last fifteen miles.

This makes life a living hell for the rest of us who have to spend the day dodging these automotive halfwits before they either crash into us or unknowingly cause accidents that they are blissfully unaware of. They will then go merrily on their way with no clue or care of the carnage they have just caused behind them. They never notice accidents they have caused because we all know they never use the rear view mirror either. These people usually come out at the weekend because 90% of bad drivers rarely venture onto the roads during the week. This is because it is either to scary or too busy for their brains to comprehend.

However, bad driving isn’t just confined to the high speed roads, oh no, you will find bad drivers wherever you go, from women doing their makeup while blocking the entrance to a car park to people towing caravans the wrong way down a one way street or even driving a vehicle that it obviously too high under a bridge that is obviously too low. And who can forget that old favourite of the old man in his obscenely large car who has become jammed between the bollards of the local McDonalds or KFC drive through. Normally I would drive right on by while laughing at their plight, but this always seems to happen when I’m hungry and when four or five cars have joined the queue behind me

I have seen people drive straight into lampposts for no apparent reason, drive down big holes in the road where there are men in luminous attire frantically waving stop signs and shouting at them, flashing lights at them and laying out row upon row of guard rails and traffic cones to avert such things from occurring. However these precautions do not seem to dampen their determination to maim and destroy. It is as though they are actually trying to crash their cars into something,

• 1
• 2
• Next Page >>