by James Coplin

Created on: December 10, 2009   Last Updated: December 12, 2009

I spend a lot of time sitting in front of closed doors. I want to know what you're doing in there. I can hear things moving, see shadows flicker and pass over the crack of the threshold. I put my paw under there to try and catch them but they are harder to snag then dust balls. I'm a cat after all, the very image of independence, and the nature of a cat is to go where one pleases. A closed door goes against everything I stand for.

You'd be amazed at the things that I know -things that you don't.  Did you know you have a centipede scratching over the carpeting in your closet? I do. The sound of it is making all those stiff hairs in my ears vibrate, singing like wind through a wire and its about to crawl into your shoe. Nothing would please me more then to go in there and knock it about, pull of its legs and leave it chewed flat. I would except once again for the door. Good luck when you slip that shoe on tomorrow morning.

My thoughts go like that. They are deliciously carnivorous but nowhere as cruel as you believe. Part of it is because of my eyes, those beautiful slanted and tinted eyes you tell me I have. I see the world in panoramic vision that takes in shapes but not images, motion instead of color. If something moves I chase it.  If I catch it, I kill it and if it's juicy and warm I often eat it whether I'm hungry or not.

Sometimes its a nuisance. There are mice out there smart enough to know that if they sit still and don't move a whisker, it's as good as if they disappeared.  I know they are there but I don't know where and it drives me crazy. So we play a waiting game, the mouse and I. I pretend I've lost interest while the mouse sits quiet until it breaks under the strain and runs. They always do.  I don't know why they bother.

Now birds!  Birds take some doing. Some of them are easy, like those stupid Thrashers that hop about pecking seeds from under the feeder.  I can sit in the bushes and take them with one pounce but I much prefer the sparrows and cardinals that perch out of my reach. The trick to them is to wait until one of them is flying too low and then jump straight in the air with my forepaws stretched to the limit. All I need is one claw to snag them and down they come. Then I carry them to my shady place on the porch and eat up their heads - my favorite part! I do pay for it when my people come across them - especially if they step on them with their bare feet! 

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