by Colin Morley

Created on: November 30, 2009

I recently heard a television comedian talking about couples watching pornography together. You get to watch two young, good looking, athletic bodies performing erotic sexual acts that turn you both on, he explained. Then you go to bed and disappoint each other.

There is, of course, an element of truth in most jokes and this is no exception. There is a body of opinion which believes that all pornography is an unhealthy perversion not to be encouraged under any circumstances. Another body of opinion claims that if a couple needs to watch pornography in order to have sex with each other then something is so wrong with the relationship that it probably isn't worth the bother of fixing.

A question. When you watch a detective movie on the television, do you believe every situation in which the actors find themselves? Do you always find the storyline to be plausible beyond dispute? Unless you are very nave, the chances are you have answered no to both these questions. Pornographic films are no different. A scene is acted out between two or more people. Generally the plot is so transparent that it is totally unnecessary. If the actors were any good at acting, would they be making a few dollars out of pornographic films? No. They are good at sex. They can hold off orgasm long enough to make an entire movie. They can make the right noises so you can be fooled into believing they are enjoying it. They can perform a variety of sexual acts at the bid of a director.

Why does sex sometimes go out of a long-standing relationship, or maybe just become a meaningless ritual with little or no real excitement? There can be a variety of reasons for this, but a good, healthy sexual relationship can reinforce a strong relationship in more respects than purely physical. If you can trust your partner one hundred percent where sex is concerned, then you can be fairly well assured that you can trust them in other aspects of the relationship. But if you are unsure about your sexual relationship, that can lead to all kinds of unpleasant tension and mistrust.

Pornography is no cure all for a broken relationship, but when a couple can watch and talk freely about what they are watching, it is a very good means of getting back to a loving and trusting feeling. The actors on screen may be doing something which you both find highly erotic. Maybe it's something you hadn't thought of yourselves. You're in a free situation, a sexually aroused state of mind and you have the chance to try it for

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