by Lawrence George

Created on: November 29, 2009   Last Updated: September 14, 2010

Christmas cards are a joy to write and receive, but they can sometimes be a chore.  When you are writing a lot of them, the temptation is to write no message or to keep it very short and sweet.

However, for many of us, receiving a card that shows someone cares about us is the greatest thing about the whole season.

So let's start with some "don't"s of writing Christmas cards, to make sure you and your friends and family enjoy the whole process.

Firstly, don't write a poem. You are almost certainly not as good a poet as you think you are, and even if you are, most Christmas verse is, almost by definition, rhyming rubbish. It will sound twee and embarrassing. Poems should be reserved for those who are very close - ie lovers, and they should be sensitive and romantic. Anything else will not work and the recipient of the card will not only laugh at you behind your back, but they will also hide your card.

Secondly, don't send one of those awful round-robin letters in the card which tells everyone you know all the trivial details of your year. Impersonal letters are often more of a disappointment than no communication at all, and these letters in particular often seem self-obsessed and arrogant. People don't really want to know how well little Jemma has been doing at school. It's not that they don't care, it's that the time for that is on the phone, or in proper, person-to-person correspondence.

Thirdly. don't go round slashing people off the list for not sending you a card last year. Instead, send them a card as usual but perhaps write a little less in it. Just a sentence maybe, asking them to get in touch or including your email address. That way you show you are still keen to know them (but you are also gently hinting that they might improve their communication skills).

So what do you do?

You write a short note, wishing the recipient all the greetings of the season and the New Year. You suggest, as appropriately for the relationship you have with them, that you miss them and it would be nice to see them soon. Remember you are sending a card because you are thinking of that person at Christmas, so your message should reflect that. Give your regards to their family. Mention a time you spent together which you think of fondly.

Also you should write a little about something you hope to do next year, and ask of them the same - being asked about one's life is always lovely and it shows that someone cares. If you haven't been closely in touch with that person for a while, offer apologies and include your email address or mobile number. Keep it short, sweet and amusing. Make someone feel that writing to you or calling would be a pleasure, and help them start the New Year with a new or revived friendship.

Hand-write it, because that gives personality and concern to any message. Don't type anything. It might be quicker but it makes a note or a message feel like it could be written for anyone.

Ultimately you should think about the person you are sending the card to, and decide for yourself what sort of message they would like to receive. A Christmas card, like Christmas, is about others, not yourself, and that should be your guiding principle.

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