by Grace Araujo Kolman

Created on: November 26, 2009   Last Updated: November 27, 2009

Marriage is challenge. Marriage is also a choice of joy, happiness and love. So, it's painful to see two people once in love in distress. We all know, of course, that after the honeymoon comes the honey dos, and that's when the "fun" begins: bills to pay, children to take care of, bad habits of your spouse that you didn't see before (remember, love is blind!), and so much stuff going on in the family, like the mother-in-law from hell, or simply the relatives trying to tell you what to do. And now and then, to make things even worse, you start having the "headache syndrome" when sex is the subject.

Well, now, it's time to say "enough!" Let's begin 2010 with new attitude and see what happens. What about commit to New Year resolutions for a better marriage that really works? Here are some ideas:

Have more time for sex. Remember that fire? It's still there! It's time to forget about the busy day, and enjoy each other. This strategy never fails. Be creative. Don't put the day of sex in the calendar. Don't make sex another part of your routine. Love is luck, but sex is a choice. Make the rights choices next year, so you will find luck in your life. In 2010 have more sex and fun with your better half.

Change your looks. New Year, new looks! Honestly, get rid of your gray hair, and find some time for your self-care. Be seductive again. Small changes in your visual will cause great effect in your relationship. Some nice initiatives include: hairdo, adding a beard, dying your hair with a different color, buying a seductive pair of underwear, dressing with more style, and much more. You can also do long term changes like, starting an exercise program, joining dance classes together, or going on a diet. Sometimes what we need to improve a relationship is a good dosage of self-esteem.

Go Spiritual. Life is overflowing with anxieties. Some of them related to death, faith, or even meaningfulness in life. A good look into the couple's spiritual life may help to find the answers you need to reboot your relationship. There is one formula that has never failed me, and I want to share with you: reserve one day of the week to pray with your family at home. It's very simple, and you don't need to bring religious or philosophical discussions to the table. Simply read a nice message, discuss it in family, or with your spouse; then have a thanksgiving prayer. This practice put life in perspective, and helps to bring new vibes to the house.

Above all, the best New Year resolution for married couple is to engage in a honest and fruitful dialogue. No judgments, no finger pointing. Forgive and forget once more; much more. Small things are small things, so don't give them the importance and attention that they don't deserve. Look at the big picture and start 2010 in love again.

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