by Stephanie Whybrow

Created on: November 20, 2009   Last Updated: September 24, 2010

I feel compelled to share experiences which lead me to lean to one side of this debacle. I need to define my idea of feminism first. I see feminism as a reflection of all the changes and develoments that have come about in recent history, those giving women much more say and freedom in general, needless to say the rights to vote, work, equal pay, and so on are notable achievements.There are on a more personal scale smaller effects that I noticed within my lifetime, such as girls playing "football" or soccer, there were no teams for girls nor were they welcome but twenty years ago. The idea of feminism for me is thus a fight for equality of the sexes, given a name.

Many would argue feminism as having reared its head in prominent oppsotion to men. I beg to differ. Circumstances in the last century show that women's liberation has not had a negative effect. However, ideas of what is valuable in each family and role plays can be taken to extremes. These extremes are often based on ideas from religious base, making one culpable of failure and rebellion thus feminism is seen as damaging.

Each family member has an important role. A man will always be a man, which i mean to say is he is no less valuable because a women is his equal. He should take into account that his responsibility to protect is also to nurture, we are no longer in neanderthal war times. A man does not need to be aggessive to protect his own. Families are a team, the team must respect, admire, support, and work alongside each other. An ideal team is where each person shares responsibilities and each one has equal value and can lean on the others. Each person deserves to share privileges, decisions, joys, sorrows, and burdens alike.

I witnessed the uncertainty of what my own father sees as family values. He insists that a woman's role is in the home. While the man is the "bread-winner". His role whilst he adores his wife involved leadership and intelligence and yet he would also help in household chores. I am quite proud of the man, however we differ when it comes to what I am sen as "achieving" to myself and "rebelling" to him. I have completed postgraduate university studies and wish to utilise all my skills and knowledge and continue to grow my knowledge. Such mental inspiration is gratifying and gives me self worth and purpose. This somehow classifes me as taking on a masculine role and therefore to his reasoning I should not have children and work, as it is not compatible.Feminism in his eyes

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