by Kathryn Day

Created on: November 18, 2009   Last Updated: November 20, 2009

Scene: Mom walks into the playroom to find her 3-year-old, James and 2-year-old, Brian fighting over a set of blocks. James screams, "No, it's mine." Brian shouts back "Mine!" James tries again, "I had it first!" Brian yells even louder "No, MINE!" Both children have their fists clasped around the block in question, and their eyes are filling up with tears. They look up at Mom. "He's not sharing!"

Sharing is a difficult concept for young children to understand. (If we are being honest, it is likely that we each know of an adult who still struggles with the concept of sharing.) So, how can we, as parents and teachers, help toddlers develop this important skill?

First, we must provide our youngsters with clear examples of appropriate ways to share. Most kids think "to share" means "give it to me, NOW!" Actually, there are three ways to share: take turns, divide or use together.

TAKE TURNS

There are many situations in a toddler's life where taking turns is an appropriate form of sharing. These might include a trip down the slide, a game of catch, or waiting in line to get ice cream. As an adult, it is important to label these type of daily situations as taking turns. If a child begins to understand what it means to take turns, they will be more receptive to the idea of taking turns when a sharing conflict arises.

It may be helpful to set up some supervised situations that encourage turn taking. Perhaps you can engage your child in a game of catch, while emphasizing the turn taking process. "Mommy's turn. Your turn. Mommy's turn..." Sometimes it is also helpful to set a time limit when taking turns. Tell your child, "It is your turn now, but when the timer sounds, it will be his turn." Make sure you are present to see that your child has followed through.

Scene cont. (option A): Mom walks over to the two children and suggests "Why don't you take turns using these blocks. I'll set a timer and Brian can play with the blocks for 5 minutes while Mommy and James go read a book. Then, when the timer beeps, it will be James's turn to play with the blocks."

DIVIDE (Some for you, some for me.)

There are also situations where dividing the item(s) in question will be appropriate. Examples may include sharing a snack, or playing with a set of toys that have multiple pieces. Again, it is best to teach this concept in daily life situations. Perhaps you can identify the division technique when you are serving dinner. "Some green beans for mommy, some green beans for daddy, and

• 1
• 2
• Next Page >>