by Samberg

Created on: November 16, 2009

Cabbage Soup diet. Acai Berry diet. Negative Calorie diet. Apple Cider diet. Grapefruit diet. Low fat, low carb, high protein, 3-day, all-you-can-eat, Beverly Hills, Look-Like-Megan-Fox-Diet.

If you've tried any of these, or any diets like them, there's a pretty good chance three things happened in the process:

1) You lost weight.
2) You gained the weight back.

3) You were really damn hungry.

Far be it for me to speak on behalf of everyone - I'm not a doctor, dietitian, or nutritionist, and everything I write is based off of my own experiences and through the observation of others who have gone through the trials and tribulations of weight loss; I'm sure there are a number of people who have taken to a more eccentric dietary regime, lost weight, and kept it off - but they seem to be a minority among dieters.

But the truth is that the concept of weight loss is easy; this is something most people are aware of on some level, but years of reading about the latest diet trends and hearing about what the most popular celebrity does to stay svelte (tonic water and cigarettes, for instance, are a fantastic diet choice if you feel like being thin enough to slip through the floor and brittle enough to snap in half in a high wind) have given the general public an unfortunate idea of what it means to engage in a weight loss program.

So for those who are frustrated with the endless fad diets, for those who are tired of the endless rules for weight loss, for those who have tried again and again to lose those extra pounds, only to throw their hands up in exasperation, I would like to present the smallest pearl of wisdom:

Weight loss is an equation.

This is the part in the article when I get to use a metaphor, because I like those: the human body is a machine that needs to be supplied regularly with energy. Depending on the size of the machine, and how often the machine is used, it needs a specific supply of energy to keep it running at peak performance.

Machines get electricity, cars get gas, autobots get energon, humans get calories; of course, everyone is different, but as a rule, there's a minimum number of calories everyone needs to eat in order to just supply their vitals. Going below this number (as fad diets normally do, often suggesting people eat below 1200 calories for 'maximum weight loss') can cause the body to gradually shut down different functions in an attempt to save vital organs, because not enough calories are being supplied. Certainly, on a diet of 1200 calories

• 1
• 2
• 3
• Next Page >>