by Melanie Aves

Created on: November 13, 2009

My grandmother was right! So many of the things she told me, and so much of the advice she gave me turned out to be true. Her wisdom came from the trials she had faced in life; estrangement from her only child, caring for an alcoholic husband who became critically ill, a financial meltdown, caring for an aging parent afflicted with dementia, and raising a grandchild as her own. Still she managed to salvage what she could from each tragedy and persevere in her quest for happiness. Her challenges made her wiser and more resilient than many, and she lived out a useful and peaceful life to the age of ninety-six. Although stress may sometimes take its toll on our physical and emotional health, there are also benefits to be derived from challenging experiences. Theodore Roosevelt was fond of preaching "Life is strife!" Our battles make us strong.

Marcel Proust said, "We don't receive wisdom; we must discover it for ourselves after a journey that no one can take for us or spare us." The idea that anyone can live out a life "happily ever after" is a myth. The Kennedy family is sadly a public example that wealth and power cannot exempt human beings from misfortunes.

In spite of an amazing array of products and services purporting to relieve and prevent tension, with maturity one understands that no one lives a life completely free from stress. Each person inevitably takes a turn at meeting his or her obstacles to success and happiness. Sometimes the difficult times happen to us directly through illness, accidents, the loss of a job, or the consequences of a bad decision. Sometimes the difficult times happen to those around us, the people we love and care for. And sometimes large scale natural disasters, wars, political and economic instabilities cause upheaval in our lives that must be faced and lived through even when we are not directly responsible for the problems. How we move through the challenging times in our lives, and how we learn from these experiences is how we build our personal wisdom. Simply mimicking the behavior of others does not reflect true understanding.

Age alone cannot endow a person with wisdom. The experiences that build wisdom may happen at any time during a life span. A young mother who undertakes the care of a special needs child, a young man faced with a failed marriage, anyone who unexpectedly loses a job or becomes widowed; these events are tragic, yet all are opportunities to gain knowledge and strength. It is up to us to seize these

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