by Nicholas Herradon

Created on: November 12, 2009

Veteran's day is a time of mixed emotions for me, a former US Army soldier. I cannot help but to honor those who have fought, bled and died while sworn to protect our constitution. I also cannot forget those who find themselves in any branch of service, who are essentially an unused resource. This is the category that I place myself in.

I am among those who left their home to train, only to idly collect dust in a stateside fort. I am among those who joined at seventeen, while fooled into thinking that the world as I knew it was completely within my control. I am one of those who fell victim to 'military friendly' programs such as the MILES program, which left me with a financially upside down car payment that I could not afford.

I am the former soldier who married out of convenience because of my greed and my need for more money. I am also the soldier who ended my marriage in divorce, because I was enabled to make such unwise decisions, such as buying a house at the age of nineteen. I was young and naive with delusions of truly being the man that I still strive to become on a daily basis.

I ask this of everyone observing Veteran's day; please increase your awareness of soldiers turned civilians in your local community. Most of them do not wish to be honored as they feel the actions they took were far from honorable. Please be aware of those who have seen and committed evils that they attempt to understand on a daily basis.

Their war is not over. They continue to fight in the only way they know how; self-destruction through self-medication, whether the drug be rage, Alcohol, LSD, and everything in between. I also ask you to be wary of those who claimed to join the military because they had a want or need to kill and destroy. I know personally that I do not wish to be honored, because I simply have done nothing but waste American tax dollars.

I drowned myself in debt while attempting to achieve that normality that most people I know seek. That normality was simply happiness, no matter what it took to satisfy that irresistible impulse.

There is not a day that passes in which I do not feel sadness for those who fight for that which they know is wrong. I feel for all of those who do without knowing why. I feel for all of those who would lay down their arms if not threatened with death for treason, which strikes a different nerve.

Our country was built so long ago on solid principles and ideals, yet I fear we have fallen from grace and have diluted the spirit that

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