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Ever wonder what to do if while cooking a Thanksgiving turkey you should drop it on the floor? Since dropping Thanksgiving turkeys may not be all that unusual and turkey droppers should know how not to panic and what to do to keep their turkey dinners going, here are a few slightly humorous suggestions.

If while cooking the Thanksgiving turkey you should drop it on the floor you should at least drop it before you unwrap it. This way, if you drop it, you will not have to worry about it picking up germs from the floor you failed to mop because you were too busy thinking about how not to drop the turkey.

Of course, a raw turkey is a slaughtered hunk of fowl so for all you know it could already have germs. In fact, it could be filled with salmonella, e coli, or viral hepatitis. However, even if your wrapped turkey is loaded with these invisible illness causers, at least the microbes will be contained inside their plastic shield waiting for you to release them and to wash them down the drain.

But, then again, if while cooking the Thanksgiving turkey you manage not to drop the turkey prior to unwrapping it, yet, you do not have the same success and you wind up dropping it on the floor after you unwrap it but before you thaw it, don't sweat it too much because you are going to put the bird in a sink of cold turkey washing water anyway. Right?

Furthermore, you shouldn't have to worry too much about the e coli, salmonella, or viral hepatitis, the turkey might have splattered across the floor when it fell because you know if you drop the celery and carrot sticks you're about to slice and set on a snacking table so your family and guests can eat them raw, without boiling microbes to death first, will fall on a different floor spot should they slip from your fumble fingers thus avoiding the turkey splattering stretched across the floor.

You might have to watch your step, however, while walking around the kitchen after the slimy naked turkey tumbles about the floor because slimy turkey water could cause you to sneaker-carry microorganisms from one spot on your kitchen tiles to other spots on your kitchen tiles. Oh and you could also give the microbes shoe-rides to the living, dining, family, bath, and all the other rooms in your house. However, you won't need to worry about that unless you actually plan to leave the kitchen at some point because if...

While cooking the Thanksgiving turkey you manage not to drop the turkey before unwrapping it but then you drop it after

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