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HUMOR AND THE LIGHTER SIDE OF HOUSEWORK

Housework and I used to be buddy pals, in fact we were soul mates and the very best of friends. There was nothing I enjoyed more than polishing brass, dusting shelves and hoovering carpets. I would go to bed at night with a twinkle in my eye because I knew that in the morning I had another fun filled day of exciting housework chores. Monday was spent dusting the whole house from top to bottom, it took hours but it was so enjoyable I was upset when the chore was successfully completed. Tuesday was the day for vacuum cleaning. Wednesday for tidying. Thursday for washing. Friday for ironing. Saturday for shopping and batch cooking for the freezer and Sunday for gardening and odds and ends. As you can imagine this all made me deliriously happy. My life was nothing but happiness, contentmente and bliss. What more could I possibly want when my life is so fun filled and exciting? But I was unlucky and it was not to last.

Just a few years ago I started to develop the most awful headaches, bloating in my stomach with stomach aches, pains in my hands, legs and arms and dizziness when I stood up. The doctor ruled out many obvious and serious ailments and illnesses until he got to one which seemed quite unlikely, but he had hit the nail on the head and I was devasted to find out that I was allergic to housework! You can imagine my horror as he explained to me that I must never lift a duster or hoover again as it could seriously affect my health. He put me into a course of tablets to relieve the symptoms but the only cure was to somehow fight the urge to do housework. This is not so easy to do, not when you are asking someone to give up something which gives them so much pleasure and has become a way of life. Help was at hand by way of various forms of therapy and I went to a rehabilitation clinic where I was amongst many other housework addicts for weeks. We sat in group sessions every morning speaking of our childhoods and how we had become addicted in the first place. But most of all we had to speak about how we would fill this huge void in our life that was now left to us by no longer spending every waking moment on housework.

Several years later I now have to put up with watching my partner do the housework for me while I lay on the couch watching television and eating pizza. You can imagine how awful I feel as he dusts and hoovers and has all the fun while I have to make do with relaxing. Of course, it is not his fault that I developed this illness so it is not fair that I am jealous of him, it is merely the way life works tricks on us and turns around and bites us in the bum. Sometimes when he is fast asleep upstairs I get out my secret stash of dvds which I have hidden away. JANIE DOES THE HOUSEWORK is my favourite and I read everything I can get hold of about people doing housework. It gives me a little fix but in no way makes up for the way I now cannot do it myself.

Now I have to make do with a life without housework and it is so sad. So please be happy that you do not have the same illness and enjoy every moment and think of how lucky you are.

Learn more about this author, Carmel Brulez.
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