by Tanya Dittberner

Created on: November 04, 2009   Last Updated: November 05, 2009

First, let's clarify that there is no such thing as a perfect relationship. What there is, however, is a happy, fulfilling relationship between two people, which like anything else in life that's worthwhile takes a lot of work, patience, and determination.

To build a solid, lasting relationship with your partner, the following elements are essential:

- Friendship

- Communication

- Intimacy

Friendship

It is important to be friends first in order to establish communication and mutual respect between two people. Once the exhilaration of the first few months of a relationship has somewhat subsided, at the very core, you want to be with someone whose company you enjoy. (Although it is very beneficial to maintain the exhilaration of the first few months throughout the course of the relationship; we'll get into that in a second.)

The happiest relationships are the ones in which both partners genuinely like each other. Whether people are two months or 47 years into their relationship, those who can honestly say, s/he is my best friend, are likely to enjoy an enduring partnership with their mate.

Communication

The benefits of healthy communication are immeasurable. But most importantly, communication is key because it allows for so many opportunities for the couple to share with one another, thus building a foundation of trust, strengthening your bond and elevating your relationship to new levels of intimacy (which leads us to the next topic).

Intimacy

Unfortunately, couples often place less importance on this delicate (yet very significant) element as time passes throughout their union. In the beginning of a relationship, the idea of estrangement (physical or emotional) is unfathomable; couples just can't seem to get enough of one another! But over time many people close that line of communication with their partners, contenting themselves with a lukewarm friendship, instead of what could potentially be a very rewarding connection with their partner.

Intimacy can mean an array of things: A brush of the arm on the way to the kitchen, a half-hour conversation of a very personal nature, a love note on the fridge, or sexual intercourse. Everybody's preference for intimacy is different; some people may prefer sexual intercourse once a week, while others may require some kind of intimate connection (as described above) every day. The important thing is that both people are on the same page. Failure to communicate intimacy preferences and/or issues with your partner can result in resentment, infidelity or a break-up.

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