by Joshua K. Bradshaw

Created on: November 04, 2009   Last Updated: November 05, 2009

It has been my experience that blood is not thicker than water. Some may beg to differ, but that's honestly how I feel. Yes, you can thank your parents for conceiving you but that does not automatically make them responsible adults or good role models. While you may have biological brothers and/or sisters, does merely having the same DNA make you closer to them? I don't think so. What about grandparents, aunts, uncles, cousins, nieces or nephews? In my experience relationships with them have been complicated at best.

Geographic distance matters

Often grown children move away to other states and start families of their own. I'm not saying there's necessarily anything wrong with this but it does tend to isolate people and cause them to get more distant emotionally. I have relatives in 6 different states and I almost never see them except for weddings or when there's a death in the family.

Relatives may have different religious and moral beliefs

Your family members could have different religious beliefs than you do and therefore different value systems. To me, I have little in common with my relatives as my religious and moral beliefs conflict with theirs. I don't disrespect their beliefs but at the same time I don't involve myself with their celebrating of the holidays. I don't believe in premarital sex or smoking cigarettes while some of them have no problem with it. Like I said, I'm not knocking them but simply stating I cannot accept their value systems and they don't accept mine. We agree to disagree, that's all.

When complications arise

I have observed that in both nuclear and extended families there's many idiosyncracies to be dealt with. I know myself that I have certain personality traits that are less than flattering, as do they. When dealing with the extended family the problems are often worse. We all know the expression 'black sheep' of the family, meaning one member who shames the rest by their conduct or is regarded as an oddball. Usually though, things aren't that pleasant because the whole family is horribly dysfunctional.

Non-relative friendships can be thicker than blood

Most of the people I'm closest with are outside my family. That's perfectly fine with me. I like to often get together with my buddies and go to sporting events, watch movies, go hiking or bike riding, go to concerts, camping, etc,etc. To me it doesn't matter that were not from the same gene pool, as we have that same wonderful bond.

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