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HUMOR: LIVING WITH ELDERLY PARENTS

i really cannot understand why so many people make a fuss about looking after their elderly parents. There is nothing to it. Luckily for me my parents are both very old, slow, weak and frail. They have hardly got breath in their body. So the first thing I did was to get them to sign over all the finances and house to me as obviously they are simply not up to dealing with it and it is too much for them to worry about. I am a very caring and unselfish person and I could not bear to see them suffer with worry over such things.

The next thing I did was to cut down their allowance so that they are only allowed $1 each a week spending money. It used to make my heart bleed when the poor dears were worrying about whether to buy this or that, now that indecision has been removed from them to no longer torment them.

Of course it is also essential that you cut down their food rations so that they eat very small meals and only one meal a day. You do this because you want them to become strong and vigorous and live to a ripe old age, and the more they eat the fatter they would get, which as we all know is very unhealthy.

They needed peace and quiet so I will not allow their friends to visit anymore. It is far better that they stay in bed all day where I have chained them to the matress with a gag over their mouth so that they do not disturb me while I am sitting here counting all the money. It also makes it easier for the times when I go off for a week at a time and leave them there waiting till my return. I would hate to think they can escape then.

Administering their medicine is a vital part of looking after your elderly parents. You must make sure that whatever the doctor has prescribed is increased to much higher doses, if possible fatal doses.

So you see, if you care about your elderly parents you can set your mind to looking after them and caring for them. It need not be a problem. I suppose it is just that some nasty people do not really care about their parents, shame on them.

Learn more about this author, Carmel Brulez.
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