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Novel excerpts: Need

by Stella Kaye

Created on: October 30, 2009

A NEED FOR DRINK, A NEED FOR LOVE

With the Christmas and New Year celebrations over and the children back at school, Clare phoned Rachel, asking if she would like to accompany her on a shopping trip to central London as they had so often done in previous years.

'Yes, that would be nice,' Rachel replied, with what appeared to Clare as genuine enthusiasm, though not committing herself to any particular date, 'I'll phone you and let you know when I'm free.'

Clare waited patiently, trustingly, and somewhat naively for the phone call which never came, and very soon January was over. Then it occurred to her that Rachel had perhaps made a New Year's resolution to avoid her completely but couldn't quite summon up enough courage to say so. She was being let down softly, as she had already suspected. A harder landing would have been more jolting and abrupt but the outcome would have been the same. Rachel,it seemed, had no time in her life for Clare anymore.

But Clare would not relinquish what little remained of their friendship; clinging to it desperately, like a shipwrecked sailor to a few shattered timbers. She knew what Rachel was doing, but never stopped hoping that her friend would one day realise how much she wanted to revive what was lost.

Andrew quite often collected Lewis from school now, with the result that Clare saw more of him than she did of Rachel. He didn't seem aware of the rift which now existed between the two women.

'How's Rachel?' Clare would often ask and he, a very open person would be forthcoming with the truth about his wife with no prompting from Clare and on one occasion was far more honest than even she had expected.

'She's been worse with her drinking again since Christmas, but she's as stubborn as ever and won't listen.'

'Do you think she might listen to me?' Clare suggested.

'Well, it's worth a try if you want to talk to her about it, because if she carries on the way she does she'll end up in hospital again - or worse.'

As Lewis and Clare's two boys came bounding energetically through the school gates Clare saw something in Andrew's eyes which she recognized in herself. He was as much a long-suffering husband as she was a long-suffering wife. He had tolerated years of living dutifully with an alcoholic partner just as she had put up with a man who didn't meet his marital obligations in denying her a sex life. Clare wondered how long should anyone be expected to endure the problems of another?

Clare, having lost all hope of Rachel ever

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