by Ted Onulak

Created on: October 29, 2009   Last Updated: January 07, 2011

In the crucible of silence

I heard my own thoughts drown

My life was like an aeroplane

That was flying upside down

As I sailed past broken furniture

And humbly looked about

A hole inside my heaving chest

Had become a crimson spout

She held on to the smoking gun

And like a knowing teacher, grinned

“I can not for give you, for I have never sinned”

One notion stood on another

Like a temple of golden bricks

They seemed to be saying something

Until they fell down just for kicks

I had seen my last sunset

Through no fault of my own

I quickly flipped through all the pages

Of the sweet life I had known

The room was getting darker

And Time began to thin

I said, “I can not for give you, since I have never sinned”

In a tender voice she whispered

“Baby, stay right there!”

I was listening to some shining strings

And wasn’t going anywhere

She ran out to find a doctor

But stopped for cigarettes

Love was on her restless mind

Mixing worn out platitudes with newly found regrets

Somewhere a radio was weeping

Carried by the wind

Singing, “I can not forgive you, for I have never sinned”

She found the doctor in a coma

With no helping hand to give

He had tried to take his own life

So that others might yet live

She shouted to the nicotine ceiling

And beat upon his chest

Neither shrieking poems nor woman’s tears

Could revive him from his rest

She never even noticed

On his chest a note was pinned

It read, “I can not forgive you, since I have never sinned”

She found a morphine needle

In a black bag by the bed

Her mind lurched like a silent prayer

That rattled in her head

She kissed that ice-cold needle

And jammed it in her arm

There was nothing left but to get high

It could now do her little harm

The poison overtook her

Where once a heart had been

refraining, “I can not forgive you, since I have never sinned”

So it all had come to nothing

Since no one took the blame

Just a few dry wooden lives

That checked out in smoke and flame

The law and local newsmen

Would try to think it through

But after 24sleepless hours

There was nothing left to do

If I could change the story

And once again begin

I know I could forgive you, because I know that I have sinned

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