by Ann Hinds

Created on: October 28, 2009

One of the advantages of graduating from high school in 1967 is that 42 years have gone by and everything has changed. With that said, I would not even be tempted to attend another reunion. It is not torture or punishment but an understanding that I am not the same person and have nothing in common with the people that shared twelve years of my life.

High school comes at the time when you escape childhood, so every detail is magnified. Best friends forever, we could not imagine that out lives would ever be separate from those that helped make sense of our changing world. Our generation had more than its share of important historical events. We will always have those memories and understand them, not as history but as reality.

Still, that was not enough, so it was with fear and trepidation that I attended the five-year reunion. I was married with two small kids. I had gained weight and was not attending an Ivy League college. Money was an issue. I knew that some of the people had done well and as always, felt inferior. My "friends" were there but they had lives that were more interesting. They were doing things. I was a working mother.

I still have the red dress I wore. We met at the Disneyland Hotel. It felt swanky and was more upscale than I was used to. Still, it was impressive and exciting. There were people that I was glad to see. Then, there were the over-achievers that were still over-achieving. It was pure joy to see the class president bald. There was sadness too. Several people had already died in Vietnam.

I do not believe that I was tortured or punished but five years down the line, having to be an adult while some were still playing, changed my point of view. It was depressing to realize that even in that short time, the changes were irreparable. We did not think the same and even those I had admired seemed sort of silly and lost.

I can only guess that today, none of it would be important. We are all getting old and time is the best way to gain perspective. I prefer to remember high school in all its glory. I do not want to be in a room with old people talking about the good old days. I prefer to think of us as young and thin, falling in and out of love and doing all the goofy things that helped us cope. I will always be grateful for the lessons my high school buddies taught me and for their friendship

Reunions are neither torture nor punishment but a great leveler. No matter what you do in life, at a reunion, you somehow step back into the roll that you were assigned then. Those who think of it as torture or punishment may learn a valuable lesson. I did. I stepped out of the assigned role and became who I am. I will not attend another reunion because I do not need to prove myself anymore. However, once in a great while, I sneak a peak on old friends on Classmates. Go figure.

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