by Amy Hite

Created on: October 27, 2009   Last Updated: November 17, 2009

It is ironic to address ways parents can cope with a teen's self-mutilation, since more than likely coping is exactly what the teen is trying to do. Indeed, self-mutilation is a coping mechanism, often used to distract from some other underlying emotional problem. The best way for you to cope with your teen's habit is to help him or her overcome it. It will not be easy. A few suggestions can help get you started.

1. Educate yourself.

According to the American Self-Harm Information Clearinghouse, approximately 1% of the population has, at one time or another, used self-inflicted physical injury as a means of coping with an overwhelming situation or feeling. Self-injury is often associated with cutting, but it can include any form of injury to one's own body. You will be much more equipped to talk to your child if you know the facts.

2. Reserve judgments.

Recognize that self-harm is not usually merely a way to seek attention, although it may be a cry for help. Teens usually self-mutilate to alleviate emotional pain or they may even seek the physical pain of an injury if they have become emotionally numb. Try not to judge your teen and be prepared to have a hard time understanding. The fastest way for your teen to shut down is by yelling or speaking in a threatening tone. Be patient.

3. Seek help.

Self-mutilation is something that some counselors are not even equipped to handle, so do not try to solve your teen's problem by yourself. Find a professional with experience in dealing with self-injury. Commit to uncovering the root of the cause of your teen's emotional stress and follow through with treatment.

4. Show support.

Give emotional and physical support. Accompany your child at counseling appointments, or seek out family counseling to learn more about the behavior and the best way to combat it. Know when to be there, and when to give your teen space. Help your teenager discover alternative ways to deal with the emotional strains that trigger the need to self-harm. Listen and provide your child with the opportunity to communicate openly with you when he/she needs to vent.

If your teen is self-mutilating, he/she needs your love and encouragement now more than ever. Most teens that self-injure are not suicidal, but the tendencies are similar. Staying calm, knowing your facts, and getting help will guide your teen to healthier behavior, and may even save his/her life.

A guide to further information:

http://www.selfinjury.com/index.html

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