by Becky Robbins

Created on: October 24, 2009   Last Updated: October 28, 2009

On your wedding day, you imagined a warm and happy forever. Marriage is not all sunshine and smiles, but takes work. When things get rough, many people choose to take the easy way out and get a divorce. If you want to fight for your marriage and avoid divorce, there are several steps you can take.

Communication

Talking to each other is the biggest commitment you can make to save your marriage. There are a lot of pressures in life, such as jobs and family life. If you stop speaking with your spouse, you are going to begin to feel like you are in it alone. It is important to actively listen. Sometimes it is easier to let what a person is saying going in one ear and out the other. However, if you truly want to make your relationship work, you need to understand what the other person is saying.

Communication does not guarantee you are going to agree about everything. It is not possible for this to happen, so be prepared to disagree sometimes. Just because you disagree does not mean the other person does not have a valid point. When having a dispute, it is important to let each person voice their side.

Make Your Relationship Your #1 Priority

When you were just dating, you would set aside time to be together. Getting married should mean that you will continue to spend quality time together. However, life tends to push the relationship down to the bottom of your list. Your children, careers, even hobbies tend to become more important.

Stop fighting with each other and join the fight to put your relationship back at the top of your list. If you have children, quality time as a family is important. According to Michele Weiner-Davis at www.divorcebusting.com, it does not say "You matter" if everyone is there. Get a sitter for the kids and go out as just husband and wife. This alone time helps you remember why you were attracted to each other in the first place. You can be creative about how you spend time together. You can go for a walk together or take in a movie. Holding hands in a dark theater, like teenagers, can help the spark.

Make Yourself a Bigger Priority

While you work on improving your marriage, you must not lose yourself. Making the decision to fight for your marriage is a wonderful decision. You want to put your all into your marriage. However, it is important to make time for yourself as well. You are more than just a mother, wife, and chauffeur. Interests and hobbies should still be pursued. Allow your husband time to enjoy his hobbies. Whether it is watching

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